| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries |
10 | The Dense One | Chaos Halfling | 2 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | m |
14 | The Gormless One | Chaos Halfling | 1 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -st |
10 | The Cringeworthy One | Chaos Halfling | 4 | 10 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | d |
6 | The Stoned One | Chaos Halfling | 5 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | d |
5 | The Manic One | Carver | 4 | 0 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | n |
5 | The Secretly Sociopathic One | Carver | 3 | 0 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | -av |
14 | The Pie Faced One | Chaos Halfling | 23 | 24 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, +AG, Catch | d |
8 | The Bent One | Chaos Halfling | 11 | 4 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -ma |
6 | The Retarded One | Chaos Halfling | 20 | 23 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Block, Side Step | d |
11 | The Squinty One | Chaos Halfling | 9 | 10 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Block | d |
11 | The Thick One | Chaos Halfling | 2 | 5 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | d |
6 | The Creepy One | Chaos Halfling | 4 | 2 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -av |
16 | The Special One | Chaos Halfling | 2 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -ma |
14 | The Pervy One | Chaos Halfling | 5 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -av |
6 | The Disturbing One | Chaos Halfling | 5 | 10 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | n |
7 | The Greasy One | Chaos Halfling | 24 | 18 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle, Side Step | m, m, m, m, m, n |
15 | The Slimy One | Chaos Halfling | 12 | 8 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | m, d |
10 | The Educationally Subnormal One | Chaos Halfling | 32 | 15 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | m, -av |
8 | The Ridiculous Haired One | Chaos Halfling | 13 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | d |
6 | The Mincey One | Chaos Halfling | 5 | 9 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | d |
15 | The Runty one | Chaos Halfling | 3 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | d |
5 | The Hyperactive One | Carver | 21 | 0 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | -st |
5 | The Tiresome One | Carver | 1 | 0 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | n |
8 | The Untalented One | Chaos Halfling | 3 | 5 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -ma |
12 | The Dead Behind The Eyes One | Chaos Halfling | 42 | 18 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle, Block | m, m, n, m, -av |
7 | The Stumpy One | Chaos Halfling | 6 | 12 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | m, -ag |
5 | The Irritating One | Carver | 2 | 0 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | -ma |
14 | The Annoying One | Chaos Halfling | 11 | 1 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | n, d |
13 | The Weird One | Chaos Halfling | 21 | 14 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Two Heads | m, d |
12 | The Arrogant One | Chaos Halfling | 3 | 5 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | -st |
11 | The One In The Closet | Chaos Halfling | 19 | 20 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Block, +AV | -av |
10 | The Hobbity One | Chaos Halfling | 9 | 10 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Two Heads | m, d |
8 | The Vapid One | Chaos Halfling | 6 | 0 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty | n |
7 | The Gimpy One | Chaos Halfling | 4 | 8 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Diving Tackle | d |
6 | The Odd Looking One | Chaos Halfling | 8 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Very Long Legs | -av |
5 | The One You Want To Punch | Carver | 3 | 0 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | -av |
4 | The Unbearable One | Carver | 12 | 5 | Chainsaw, Dodge, Right Stuff, Secret Weapon | d |
2 | Louis Walsh | Chaos Spawn | 38 | 89 | Frenzy, Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Horns, Always Hungry, Loner, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate, Wild Animal, Tentacles, Juggernaut, Stand Firm, Block, Guard | m, m, d |