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Past Players of All-time Greatest Stand-Ups
| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 12 | Dan Antopolski II | Skeleton Lineman | 1 | 0 | Thick Skull, Regeneration | d |
| 3 | Billy Connolly II | Tomb Guardian | 10 | 6 | Decay, Regeneration, Guard | d |
| 12 | Dan Antopolski | Skeleton Lineman | 10 | 0 | Thick Skull, Regeneration | -ma |
| 9 | Emo Phillips | Skeleton Lineman | 1 | 0 | Thick Skull, Regeneration | d |
| 7 | Chris Rock | Anointed Thrower | 4 | 7 | Sure Hands, Pass, Regeneration, Block | d |
| 6 | Richard Pryor | Anointed Blitzer | 23 | 40 | Block, Regeneration, Mighty Blow, Tackle, Piling On | d |
| 5 | Robin Williams | Anointed Blitzer | 16 | 56 | Block, Regeneration, Dodge, Sure Hands, Fend, Tackle | d |
| 3 | Billy Connolly | Tomb Guardian | 2 | 2 | Decay, Regeneration | d |
| 1 | Bill Hicks | Tomb Guardian | 13 | 13 | Decay, Regeneration, Guard | m, -av |