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Sketch opens with a pan across Bolton. <P align=left> Voice Over: This is a frightened city. Over these houses, over these streets hangs a pall of fear. Fear of a new kind of violence which is terrorizing the city. Yes, gangs of old ladies attacking defenceless fit young men. </P> (Film of old ladies beating up two young men; then several grannies walking aggressively along street, pushing passers-by aside.) <P align=left> First Young Man: Well they come up to you, like, and push you - shove you off the pavement, like. There's usually four or five of them. Second Young Man: Yeah, this used to be a nice neighbourhood before the old ladies started moving in. Nowadays some of us daren't even go down to the shops. ' Third Young Man: Well Mr Johnson's son Kevin, he don't go out any more. He comes back from wrestling and locks himself in his room. </P> (Film of grannies harassing an attractive girl.) <P align=left> Voice Over: What are they in it for, these old hoodlums, these layabouts in lace? First Granny: (voice over) Well it's something to do isn't it? Second Granny: (voice over) It's good fun. Third Granny: (voice over) It's like you know, well, innit, eh? Voice Over: Favourite targets for the old ladies are telephone kiosks. </P> (Film of grannies carrying off a telephone kiosk; then painting slogans on a wall.) Hell's Grannies' names <a href="http://fumbbl.com/index.php?name=PNphpBB2&file=viewtopic&t=8809">thread</a>. |
Player | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Inj | G | Cp | Td | It | Cs | Mvp | SPP | Cost | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Dodge Mighty Blow |
  | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6/ | 110k
(120)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
2 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Dodge Guard, Mighty Blow |
  | 17 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 29/ | 130k
(143)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
3 |
Blitzer
|
7 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Dodge Mighty Blow, +MA, Guard, Tackle |
n | 19 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 9 | 2 | 57/ | 180k
(165)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
4 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Dodge Mighty Blow |
  | 11 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 11/ | 110k
(120)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
5 |
Linewoman
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge Block |
  | 13 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 10/ | 70k
(90)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
6 |
Linewoman
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge Block, Dirty Player |
m | 19 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 17/ | 90k
(0)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
7 |
Thrower
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Pass Sure Hands, Block |
  | 9 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 23/ | 110k
(133)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
8 |
Catcher
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Catch, Dodge |
  | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2/ | 70k
(75)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
9 |
Linewoman
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge Block, Tackle |
  | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 23/ | 90k
(120)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
10 |
Linewoman
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge |
  | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2/ | 50k
(50)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
11 |
Linewoman
|
7 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge Block, +MA |
  | 13 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 19/ | 100k
(133)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
14 |
Thrower
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Pass |
  | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1/ | 70k
(65)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
15 |
Catcher
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 5 | Catch, Dodge Block, Side Step, Guard |
-av, -av | 51 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 47/ | 140k
(150)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
16 |
Linewoman
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge |
  | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3/ | 50k
(50)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
13 players (+1 player missing next game) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Games Played: | 60 (36/9/15) | | | TD Diff: | 53 (122 - 69) | | | Cas Diff: | 66 (102/65/34 - 65/45/25) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Last Opponent: Finest Movies |
Opponent | # | Record | TD | Cas | TV | ||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
W/D/L | Avg | Avg | Avg diff | ||||||
Amazon | 6 | 5/0/1 | 2.5 | - | 1.3 | 2.0 1.5 1.0 | - | 1.0 0.8 0.3 | -53k |
Chaos Chosen | 4 | 3/1/0 | 1.5 | - | 0.5 | 2.3 1.8 0.3 | - | 1.3 1.5 0.3 | -8k |
Chaos Dwarf | 1 | 0/0/1 | 1.0 | - | 2.0 | 0.0 1.0 0.0 | - | 3.0 0.0 2.0 | -210k |
Dark Elf | 6 | 3/1/2 | 1.8 | - | 1.7 | 1.2 1.7 0.5 | - | 1.2 0.7 0.3 | 37k |
Dwarf | 1 | 0/0/1 | 1.0 | - | 3.0 | 0.0 2.0 0.0 | - | 2.0 2.0 0.0 | -110k |
High Elf | 3 | 2/1/0 | 3.3 | - | 1.7 | 1.7 1.0 1.3 | - | 0.7 0.0 0.3 | -10k |
Human | 5 | 2/0/3 | 1.0 | - | 1.4 | 1.2 0.6 0.6 | - | 1.6 1.2 0.2 | -90k |
Lizardmen | 5 | 3/0/2 | 2.0 | - | 1.0 | 1.6 0.6 0.4 | - | 1.0 0.2 0.6 | -142k |
Necromantic Horror | 3 | 2/0/1 | 2.0 | - | 0.7 | 2.7 3.0 0.3 | - | 0.7 0.3 0.3 | -3k |
Norse | 2 | 2/0/0 | 4.0 | - | 0.5 | 2.0 0.5 0.5 | - | 1.0 0.5 0.5 | -10k |
Nurgle | 1 | 0/0/1 | 1.0 | - | 2.0 | 2.0 1.0 0.0 | - | 1.0 1.0 0.0 | 20k |
Ogre | 1 | 1/0/0 | 2.0 | - | 0.0 | 1.0 0.0 0.0 | - | 1.0 0.0 0.0 | 80k |
Orc | 7 | 5/1/1 | 1.6 | - | 0.7 | 1.0 0.6 0.6 | - | 1.6 0.9 0.6 | -90k |
Shambling Undead | 2 | 1/0/1 | 2.0 | - | 1.0 | 3.0 0.5 0.5 | - | 1.0 1.0 0.5 | -10k |
Skaven | 5 | 1/3/1 | 1.8 | - | 1.4 | 2.4 0.4 0.8 | - | 0.6 0.4 0.6 | -192k |
Tomb Kings | 4 | 4/0/0 | 2.0 | - | 0.8 | 0.8 1.0 0.8 | - | 0.8 1.8 0.8 | -5k |
Vampire | 1 | 0/1/0 | 3.0 | - | 3.0 | 3.0 1.0 0.0 | - | 0.0 1.0 0.0 | -470k |
Wood Elf | 3 | 2/1/0 | 3.7 | - | 0.7 | 3.0 1.3 0.3 | - | 0.7 0.0 0.0 | -317k |
Total | 60 | 36/9/15 | 2.0 | - | 1.2 | 1.7 1.1 0.6 | - | 1.1 0.8 0.4 | -77k |