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[X] Orc
| <table><tr><td></td><td><center><big><big><big><b>***</b></big></big></center></td></tr><tr><td><img src="http://fumbbl.com/teams/71134.jpg"></td><td>Drunk off his butt, Coach Slick drags himself into a local restaurant after retiring his latest failure of a Blood Bowl team with his head hung low ready to give up on the whole thing. Suddenly he feels someone poking him followed by a low bellied grunt. He turns to see one hell of an ugly orc staring down at him with an impatient look on his face. The orc asks him, "Wut want?" Terrified, Slick realizes he has stumbled into an orc restaurant. After a few moments have passed the orc gets right down in his face and yells, "Wut want!?" Trembling, Slick manages to stammer out, "I...I...I will take the special." Disgusted, the orc stomps off muttering, "Speshal, speshal, it wantz speshal." A few minutes later the same orc, or at least it looked like the same orc, plops a plate in front of Slick and says, "Eet dis." When he looks down at his plate of grey, goopy something, he notices that his "food" seems to be still moving. Horrified, he runs to the bathroom, a hole in the floor in the corner of the room, to lose his lunch. At the sound of his hurling, a huge black orc wearing a chef's hat comes flying out of the kitchen screaming, "Noooooo!" The gigantic orc leans over Slick and says, "In dis!" as he places a bucket under the coaches face. Once he stops puking, the black orc walks back into the kitchen with a big grin on his ugly face the whole way. Once out of sight, Slick hears the monstrous orc yell, "Dezertz up." While leaning over the crapper, the coach suddenly gets very dizzy from the smell and passes out on the filthy floor.</td></tr><tr><td></td><td><center><big><big><big><b>***</b></big></big></center></td></tr><tr><td><img src="http://fumbbl.com/teams/71135.jpg"></td><td>Oof!" Slick is painfully awoken when a rather large orc accidentally stomps on his ribcage after being knocked backwards by a flying headbutt from a tossed goblin. As the coach trys to stand up he screams, "Holy crap, what's going on!?" The orc jumps as he is startled by this and trips over Slick's now bruised body falling through a table. Crash!!! Boom!!! Slick sits up and looks around and is surprised to see a mound of orcs and goblins pounding, trampling, and biting each other. The orcs are flinging the goblins across the room trying to get at something at the bottom of the pile. Slick winces as a goblin smashes a chair over an orcs head causing his eye to burst out of his head. Concerned that the melee might head in his direction, he decides to make a break for the door to escape the madness but while running for it he stumbles forward as he is struck in the back by another flying goblin. Slick rolls over and tries to get up to make another break for the door. As he looks up he is terrified when he realizes the violent monsters are charging directly at him. The coach throws the fallen goblin off his body and notices a pigs bladder fly out from its unconcious hands. As the bladder tumbles across the room the unruly bunch turns to chase it down stampeding over one another. Slick then crawls on his hands and knees into a corner and hunkers down with his hands over his head(as if it will protect him). Suddenly the black orc who collected "dessert" from the coaches face, storms out of the kitchen and plows through the pile of orcs and goblins sending the greenskins flying everywhere. The orc chef leans over two goblins that are still fighting over the pig's bladder and smashes their heads together making a disturbing cracking sound. The tremendous black orc snatches the bladder from the goblin's now lifeless hands and makes a quick glance around the room exclaiming "Mine!" The goblins all scatter out of the restaurant frightened for their fragile little lives as the other orcs in the room start to stand up and dust themselves off. As the orc chef walks back into the kitchen Slick sits on the floor baffled at what has happened. He cautiously approaches the orc who served him the "special" and stutters, "Wha ... wha ... wha ... what was that all about?" The bruised orc pulls a gobin tooth out of his arm glaring back at Slick and mutters, "Teves."</td></tr><tr><td></td><td><center><big><big><big><b>***</b></big></big></center></td></tr><tr><td></td><td></td></tr></table> <b><u><big><big>Collected Ingredients</big></big></u></b> <u>Goblin Eyeballs</u>: picked up by <a href="http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=player&player_id=2351291">Krak "Da Cooka"</a> when he smashed <a href="http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=player&op=view&player_id=2353755">Gedo-jun's</a> head in for stepping on his foot. <u>Amazon Toe</u>: pocketed by <a href="http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=player&player_id=2351360">Bringa</a> when he ripped it off <a href="http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=player&player_id=2311052">Sandra's</a> foot causing her to bleed to death. <b><u><big><big>Big Blunders</big></big></u><b> |
New Team Page Beta
| Player | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Inj | G | Cp | Td | It | Cs | Mvp | SPP | Cost | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | Block, Guard |
10 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 21/ | 120k
(128)k |
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| 2 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/ | 80k
(80)k |
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| 3 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | Block, Guard |
10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 21/ | 120k
(128)k |
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| 4 |
Black Orc Blocker
|
4 | 4 | 2 | 9 | Block, Guard |
10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 17/ | 120k
(128)k |
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| 5 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block Mighty Blow |
10 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 12/ | 100k
(105)k |
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| 6 |
Blitzer
|
7 | 4 | 3 | 9 | Block +ST, +MA |
n | 10 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 16/ | 160k
(150)k |
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| 7 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Block |
-ag, m | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5/ | 80k
(0)k |
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| 8 |
Blitzer
|
6 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block Mighty Blow |
n, m | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 13/ | 100k
(0)k |
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| 9 |
Lineman
|
5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Kick |
10 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 8/ | 70k
(70)k |
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| 10 |
Lineman
|
5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4/ | 50k
(50)k |
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| 11 |
Lineman
|
5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block |
10 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7/ | 70k
(70)k |
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| 9 players (+2 players missing next game) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Games Played: | 10 (7/1/2) | | | TD Diff: | 8 (16 - 8) | | | Cas Diff: | 16 (9/6/5 - 2/2/0) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Last Opponent: Simply Wolves | |||||||
| Opponent | # | Record | TD | Cas | TV | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| W/D/L | Avg | Avg | Avg diff | ||||||
| Vampire | 1 | 1/0/0 | 4.0 | - | 0.0 | 1.0 1.0 0.0 | - | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | 80k |
| Amazon | 1 | 1/0/0 | 2.0 | - | 1.0 | 1.0 0.0 2.0 | - | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | 30k |
| Chaos Chosen | 1 | 1/0/0 | 1.0 | - | 0.0 | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | - | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | 20k |
| Dwarf | 1 | 0/1/0 | 1.0 | - | 1.0 | 1.0 0.0 0.0 | - | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | 30k |
| Goblin | 1 | 1/0/0 | 2.0 | - | 1.0 | 2.0 2.0 0.0 | - | 1.0 0.0 0.0 | -100k |
| Necromantic Horror | 1 | 0/0/1 | 1.0 | - | 2.0 | 1.0 0.0 2.0 | - | 0.0 2.0 0.0 | 100k |
| Ogre | 1 | 0/0/1 | 0.0 | - | 2.0 | 0.0 2.0 0.0 | - | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | -90k |
| Orc | 2 | 2/0/0 | 1.5 | - | 0.0 | 1.0 0.0 0.5 | - | 0.0 0.0 0.0 | -20k |
| Skaven | 1 | 1/0/0 | 2.0 | - | 1.0 | 1.0 1.0 0.0 | - | 1.0 0.0 0.0 | -60k |
| Total | 10 | 7/1/2 | 1.6 | - | 0.8 | 0.9 0.6 0.5 | - | 0.2 0.2 0.0 | -3k |