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[R] Goblin
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 We manage to Survive A badly coached, pacifist and intellectual bunch of little greenskins. - Club History - The Calm Kaos Company foundation involved a bunch of goblins, a smuggling of warpstone, a teleporter and a drunk guy from a different dimension that nothing have to deal with the weird italian '18 summer and the political struggles that are still afflicting the country. The meeting of this promiscuous protagonists gifted us with one of the finest licterature club that gobs have ever seen... well, probably the only one and, if luck is with us, the last one. You'll certainly agree with me that to cross the golden door of the best poetry accademy of Tilea beeing totally drunk, with some gobs, a lot of warpstone and two trolls it's not an easy task. Things went wrong, people get angry and a ball was hanging around minding it's own business... welcome to Calm Kaoz Company! Maybe not the best poetry club but for sure not the best blood bowl team! - Notable Active Players - Pazolini is probably the most famous active (and highest paid, sigh) player of the team, and also the smallest one! Despite the size, him and his motorcycle chainsaw, named "Passion, Perversion and Pain" shortly "PPP", are always welcomed by the roars of the crowds. His performance on the field is comparable only with his damn good ability to make lot of money out of the merchandising and the selling of his poetry book "Memories of a Pervert and his Chainsaw" . There's even some player named after him but just a few of them can actually say to be in his entourage! Pazolini is known for his neorealistic style heavly influenced by Tilean culture, his writings explore the relation between society, religion and sexuality. The attentive reader will found a provocative but effective trend that reminds to the political controversies of the last century. Here's some lines from the book "Memories of a Pervert and His Chainsaw" - ’tzil menz will ‘xploit menz, ‘tilz manzkind iz divided ‘nto zlaves ‘nd masterz no peace will be . Reazon of all bleah of world iz here. Luckily me a gob and wiz my chainsaw me go and give a lessonz to arrogantz badheadz baz-tard humanz causing all diz trouble to oderz! - Iz da sand of da pitch, not da sin of da foul, dat zeparate uz from heaven - Me zavagely love life, me like mine and peoplez perversion. Me motto iz zex, chainsaw und poetry. Ow is dat go to end? Well, me a gob, a gob wid chainsaw... Du kan make gud guess.” Pazolini favorite (After his chainsaws-bike obviously) is a Witch Elf from the Black Panters of Palenque, a certain Pazzolina the Creepy One . A couple of Paparazzi insinuate that they have a relation and that they even bring Pazolini's chainsaw in their bed but they refused to publish any picture to preserve their readers mental health. What a pair of trolls have to share with a Poetry Club is a question that the coach avoid cautiously, except maybe in some wild and drunk nights, and, seen the results on the field, the fan kindly avoid to pose. While Leopardi is the one that don’t like to lose time in chitchatting and goes straight to impose is hermetic, and still really effective, violence, Manzoni is the artist of complexity who likes to surprise with his fast and weird actions. The identical twins are the only active players who managed to intercept a ball. - Hall of fame - Hugo "Da Starvin" Foscolo, The Legend, 81G, 32 TD, 206 ssp "That little Punk! That incredible agile player! Da frickin' Legend! Was the fastest gob I’ve ever seen but he also was a poetry maniac and from time to time he liked to have a break and talk about is passion with who was around. Sadly the stinkig thing that killed him wasn't so interested on the social consequences of Tilean New Wave Romanticism." Da Licterate One, The Strong Gobbo, 82G, 405 Bl, 18Cs, 88 ssp "Poetry wasn't Da Lictertate's coup of tea. This gob, nothing lass then Foscolo's cousin, wasn't even a pacifist. To be honest he was pretty different from the rest of the team, not really clever and everything else but, well, he was a half decent lineman. Probably the best half decent lineman that Calm Kaoz Company will ever see." Gobbo "Da Killah" D'Annunzio, The +MA Fanatic , 56G, 20Cs, 55 ssp "You know, when you coach gobs it's hard to don't fall in love with the pretty stupid idea that a gob handling an enormous spiked ball is poetry at it's finest. D'Annunzio, the very first one, was chanting some of the most dramatic goblin's songs I ever heard while he was swinging around the field in the opposite direction of where the action was." Big Guy Manzoni III, The Caravan of the Team, 65G, 34Cs, 1In!, 95ssp "Big Guy Manzoni da third was damn slow and not really made for poetry. On the other hand he was a enormous pile of damn cleverness. He was even able to spell his entire name... most of the times... like, twice, err, once he made it, that's sure." CABALNET THIS MESSAGE IS OFFERED BY OrcaCola (Click the white star to continue) CABALNET ___________________________________________ ______________..WROOM.. ______ ____________________________________________ ___________________________________________ CABALNET Our Hero was enjoying the gentle breeze of Tilea CABALNET ___________________________________________ ________________________ ____________________________________________ _______________..WROOM..______ ___________________________________________ CABALNET ___________________________________________ _______________..WROOM..______ ____________________________________________ ___________________________________________ CABALNET ___________________________________________ ________________________ ____________________________________________ _______________..WROOM..______ ___________________________________________ CABALNET While suddenly... (Dramatic tone) CABALNET ___________________________________________ _____________________ ____________________________________________ ___________________________________________ CABALNET TAN TAN TAN TAAAAAAN!!!! CABALNET TAAAN TAAAAAN TAAAAAAAAN TAAAAAAAAAAAAAN CABALNET !!DA BLOODY ELF!! (now is the moment to put kids to bed) CABALNET ___________________________________________ _______________..SKREEK..______ ____________________________________________ ___________________________________________ CABALNET Our hero explained his reasons slowly and politely. CABALNET You filthy pointy earz BAZ-TARD! CABALNET The elf, as expected, responded vulgarly and with an histeric tone! CABALNET _____________Me Elf! Me Bloody! Me Sorry!______ CABALNET We know, we know dear spectator... Enough is enough! The INSULT had to be CLEARED! CABALNET !But worry not! WROM, WROOOM, WROOOOOM! CABALNET ...WROOOM...______ Our Hero start a blitz action. ..Chainsaw Roll [6] ....Our Hero uses his chainsaw. ..Our Hero blitz Bloody Elf: ....Armour Roll [6][6] ......Rolled total of 12 ......The armour of Bloody Elf has been broken ....Injury Roll [6][6] ......Rolled total of 12 ......Bloody Elf suffers a casuality ....Casuality Roll [6][6] ......Da Bloody Elf has been killed CABALNET Da Bloody Elf has been killed CABALNET ___________________________________________ _______________ ____________________________________________ ___________________________________________ CABALNET The soild rests of Da Bloody Elf were given to the Trolls CABALNET nom nom nom CABALNET Our hero went back to the castle where he had multiple affair with differente ladies.. CABALNET OH YEAH  CABALNET OH YEAH CABALNET Some pretty wild adventure.. CABALNET OH YEAH CABALNET And some really, really wild adventure too... CABALNET OH... ...NAAAAA?!?! CABALNET The he organized a huge party, gobs from every corner of the world traveled to be at the party of the century! CABALNET PARTY __ |__| ____|__|____ CABALNET All the relevant Blood Bowl Player were there! CABALNET CABALNET The party was amazing, and 'shrooms where free! CABALNET TUNZ! TUNZ! TUNZ! CABALNET TUNZ! TUNZ! TUNZ! CABALNET TUNZ! TUNZ! TUNZ! CABALNET The party ended, the blood stain was washed away, heart were broken, drugs were teken and they lived happily ever after.. CABALNET Pazolini we Love you! CABALNET _____________Me too!! Naaaa, naaaa!______ CABALNET This movie was offered by OrcaCola. It was made for an interracial fundrising campaign to force elf to wear chain before even think to put a feet on the pitch CABALNET "The Bloody Elf, they play so good we need to bribe the ref!" (jingle) CABALNET - in collaboration with - Calm Kaoz Company |
New Team Page Beta
| Player | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Inj | G | Cp | Td | It | Cs | Mvp | SPP | Cost | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| 1 |
Troll
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4 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Always Hungry, Loner, Mighty Blow, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate Block, Guard, Tackle, Break Tackle, Multiple Block |
63 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 37 | 6 | 112/176 | 230k
(110+120)k |
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| 2 |
Troll
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5 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Always Hungry, Loner, Mighty Blow, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate Guard, Block, Break Tackle, +MA, Juggernaut |
64 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 23 | 9 | 93/176 | 230k
(110+120)k |
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| 3 |
'Ooligan
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Disturbing Presence, Dodge, Fan Favourite, Right Stuff, Stunty |
0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 70k
(70+0)k |
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| 4 |
Looney
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6 | 2 | 4 | 7 | Chainsaw, Secret Weapon, Stunty +AG, Dodge, Block |
82 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 48/51 | 130k
(40+90)k |
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| 5 |
Fanatic
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3 | 7 | 3 | 7 | Ball & Chain, No Hands, Secret Weapon, Stunty Guard |
4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10/16 | 90k
(70+20)k |
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| 6 |
Bomma
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Bombardier, Dodge, Secret Weapon, Stunty |
5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 40k
(40+0)k |
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| 7 |
Goblin
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty Diving Tackle |
25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 9/16 | 60k
(40+20)k |
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| 8 |
Goblin
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty |
6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 40k
(40+0)k |
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| 9 |
Goblin
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty |
3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 40k
(40+0)k |
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| 10 |
Goblin
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty |
21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 40k
(40+0)k |
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| 11 |
Goblin
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty |
n | 33 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 40k
(40+0)k |
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| 13 |
Pogoer
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7 | 2 | 4 | 7 | Dodge, Leap, Stunty, Very Long Legs Sure Feet, +AG, Sprint |
19 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 44/51 | 150k
(70+80)k |
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| 14 |
Doom Diver
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6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Right Stuff, Stunty, Swoop Dodge, Block |
6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 18/31 | 110k
(60+50)k |
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| 13 players | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Games Played: | 170 (19/21/130) | | | TD Diff: | -245 (111 - 356) | | | Cas Diff: | -267 (230/96/46 - 444/137/58) |
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| Last Opponent: MSU Fencing All-Stars | |||||||