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Phil, The Prince of insufficient light
#1
Minotaur
MA
5
ST
5
AG
3
AV
8
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
15
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
6
Td
1
Mvp
3
GPP
30
XPP
0
SPP
30
Injuries
 
Skills
Always Hungry
Big Guy
Frenzy
Horns
Mighty Blow
Thick Skull
Throw Team Mate
Wild Animal
+AG
Break Tackle
Phil, The Prince of Insufficient Light, is the ruler of Heck (for sinners whose transgressions aren't serious enough for Hell). He pops up about once a year to impose mild sanctions for mild sins. For example, once he punished Dilbert by making him eat lunch with the accountants.

Minataur Halfback:

Yards Rushed : 4
Dogbert
#2
Bull Centaur
MA
6
ST
4
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
16
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
2
Td
1
Mvp
2
GPP
17
XPP
0
SPP
17
Injuries
 
Skills
Sprint
Sure Feet
Thick Skull
Break Tackle
Frenzy
Genetically he may be a dog, but Dogbert is no man's best friend. He treats people with disdain, reserving special contempt for Dilbert, who's no master--or match--for Dogbert. (Although he wouldn't admit it, if push came to shove, he'd protect the bumbler. And never let him forget it).

His not-so-secret ambition is to conquer the world and enslave all humans. He anointed himself St. Dogbert, and as such takes special delight in exorcising the demons of stupidity.
 
Dilbert
#4
Chaos Dwarf Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
16
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
2
XPP
0
SPP
2
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Dilbert loves technology for the sake of technology. In fact, Dilbert loves technology more than people. He's got the social skills of a mousepad and he'd rather surf the Internet than Waikiki (which, considering the physique he developed after years of sitting in front of a PC screen, is a blessing).
Wally
#5
Chaos Dwarf Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
15
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
2
GPP
12
XPP
0
SPP
12
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Guard
Dilbert's colleague and fellow engineer is a thoroughly cynical employee who has no sense of company loyalty and feels no need to mask his poor performance or his total lack of respect.
 
Mordac, Tech Support
#6
Chaos Dwarf Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
8
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
15
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
4
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
13
XPP
0
SPP
13
Injuries
-av
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Guard
Mordac - He's the evil-hearted director of Information Services for Dilbert's company. He believes his mission is to make it as difficult as possible for employees to use their computers or the network.
Alice
#7
Chaos Dwarf Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
8
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
5
XPP
0
SPP
5
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Alice is the only female engineer in Dilbert's department. She's habitually overworked. Her cardiovascular system is basically coffee. She has a quick temper when confronted with the idiocy of her co-workers. She does not handle criticism well.
 
Asok The Intern
#8
Chaos Dwarf Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
15
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
2
GPP
12
XPP
0
SPP
12
Injuries
n
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Guard
Asok, pronounced ah-shook, was introduced to satisfy the hordes of interns who wrote to request their own character. Asok is brilliant, but as an intern he is immensely naive about the cruelties and politics of the business world. His name is a common one in India (but usually spelled Ashok).
The World's Smartest Garbageman
#9
Chaos Dwarf Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
16
Cp
0
In
1
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
7
XPP
0
SPP
7
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Guard
Dilbert's "sanitation engineer" is a mysterious character who has inexplicable knowledge of all subjects from science to philosophy. He shows up occasionally to solve impossibly complex problems for Dilbert or Dogbert.
 
Ratbert
#10
Hobgoblin
MA
7
ST
3
AG
3
AV
7
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
15
Cp
3
In
0
Cs
0
Td
4
Mvp
1
GPP
20
XPP
0
SPP
20
Injuries
 
Skills
+MA
Block
Ratbert is a simpleminded optimist. He wants nothing more than to be loved, but he's doomed to ratdom which, despite his cheerfulness, makes him an unlikely candidate for affection. His resiliency enables him to continually be the butt of everyone's jokes.
Carol, Secretary with a Crossbow
#11
Hobgoblin
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
7
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
16
Cp
9
In
0
Cs
1
Td
1
Mvp
1
GPP
19
XPP
0
SPP
19
Injuries
n
Skills
+AG
Sure Hands
She's the "secretary from hell" who hates her job and finds perverse joy in making everyone within a two-mile radius suffer.