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Area Men United
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Area Man Goaded Into Climbing Mt. Everest
#1
Blitzer
MA
7
ST
3
AG
4
AV
7
R
92
B
127
P
11
F
1
G
19
Cp
6
In
1
Cs
6
Td
6
Mvp
3
GPP
53
XPP
0
SPP
53
Injuries
-av
Skills
Block
Dodge
Frenzy
Mighty Blow
Tackle
Area Man Perpetually In Process Of Buying Or Selling Car
#2
Blitzer
MA
7
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
64
B
58
P
14
F
1
G
14
Cp
4
In
1
Cs
1
Td
8
Mvp
0
GPP
32
XPP
0
SPP
32
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Leap
Tackle
 
Area Man Had No Idea There Was So Much To Know About Buying A Sofa
#3
Blitzer
MA
7
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
47
B
49
P
1
F
1
G
12
Cp
1
In
0
Cs
4
Td
6
Mvp
0
GPP
27
XPP
0
SPP
27
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Tackle
Area Man Thinking Up Funny Things To Say For Next Football Game
#4
Blitzer
MA
7
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
31
B
18
P
0
F
1
G
8
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
2
Td
4
Mvp
0
GPP
16
XPP
0
SPP
16
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Tackle
 
Area Man Somehow Even Less Popular Than He Was In High School
#5
Witch Elf
MA
7
ST
3
AG
4
AV
7
R
14
B
3
P
5
F
0
G
1
Cp
3
In
1
Cs
1
Td
1
Mvp
0
GPP
10
XPP
0
SPP
10
Injuries
 
Skills
Dodge
Frenzy
Jump Up
Block
Area Man Disappointed To See Short Version Of Commercial
#7
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
43
B
69
P
-2
F
3
G
25
Cp
2
In
0
Cs
2
Td
1
Mvp
3
GPP
24
XPP
0
SPP
24
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
 
Area Man Goes And Gets Himself Hit By A Goddamn Bus
#8
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
35
B
54
P
1
F
4
G
26
Cp
7
In
0
Cs
0
Td
3
Mvp
0
GPP
16
XPP
0
SPP
16
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Area Man Doesn't Look Jewish
#9
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
68
B
85
P
13
F
1
G
26
Cp
11
In
1
Cs
4
Td
2
Mvp
3
GPP
42
XPP
0
SPP
42
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Tackle
 
Area Man's Free Time Monopolized By Friend With No Other Friends
#10
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
34
B
60
P
1
F
0
G
25
Cp
8
In
0
Cs
4
Td
4
Mvp
2
GPP
38
XPP
0
SPP
38
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Guard
Area Man Has Naked-Lady Fetish
#13
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
34
B
33
P
7
F
3
G
26
Cp
7
In
0
Cs
2
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
16
XPP
0
SPP
16
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
 
Area Man Refuses To Accept Bus-Route Change
#14
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
23
B
55
P
0
F
1
G
26
Cp
7
In
1
Cs
2
Td
1
Mvp
3
GPP
31
XPP
0
SPP
31
Injuries
 
Skills
Block
Dodge
Kick
Area Man Feeds Own Self
#15
Lineman
MA
6
ST
3
AG
4
AV
8
R
29
B
30
P
12
F
7
G
26
Cp
8
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
10
XPP
0
SPP
10
Injuries
 
Skills
Guard