Vorl'Smarn iz a nasty peez of work. Iz wud not wan im playin wid me on da feeld cuz 'e wud probly sqish me for da fun of it. But datz ok, cuz im da coach, so I dont 'av to play wid im, juz stand on da out line an yell lotz. Eez reely big an tuff, an eez gonna scare lotza da opozitin. 'E alredy scarez most of da boyz an I tink eez tryin ta kill Bort but 'e swers dat 'e iz only playin wen 'e putz im in iz mouth.

Yooz gotta be carfool round Quar'Van cuz eez like ta eat mor dan iz uzshul for a troll. I reckon 'e iz gonna eat evryone but datz ok, cuz 'e is ded ard an der iz alwayz more grots. Juz az long az 'e duzn eat me, cuz I'm da coach an dat wud be bad for da team. But mainly for me.

Da boyz ar still wonderin wy dey cant make Iz die. Deyz tryd kickin 'im, punchin 'im, eatin 'im, stabbin 'im, cookin 'im, drownin 'im, stretchin 'im, rippin 'im, smashin 'im, eatin 'im(Quar'Varn woz reely hungry dat day) and lotza uda tings but the littl sneak juz wont die.

Corz, lotsa da team don no why we keep tryin ta kill 'im, but deyz stoopid an weez gonna eat em afta weez dun killin Iz.

Da Mity Zeg az bin watchin Blood Bowl sinz 'e woz a littl grot. Iz favorit playa is Da Mighty Zug an he wanz ta be juz like 'im. Trubl iz, 'e iz a tiny littl stoopid grot an 'e iz gonna get sqishd reel soon. An we all gonna larf cuz itl be funni. 'E also hate dat Incredibl Bolk cuz dey keep fightin ova oo iz da stronga wun. Quar'Varn reckons eez gonna eat bota dem.

Wen Bolk wuz born, 'is parentz dezided it wud be a good gag to make 'im tink dat he wuz sum kinda monsta! Da stupid git still tinks heez got supa gobbo strenth and wen da rage takes 'im, 'ez unstopubl. Mostly cuz 'ez runnin da rong way.