After consuming prodigious amount of pizza, hot dogs, and newborn babies, The Great Wall has grown to a strength unparalleled by any other Squire.

Ryan is the "funny man" of the team. When he isn't eating or smacking a Skink in the gut, he's cracking jokes.

Nearly immune to injury, The Tank has only gone down once - when attempting to overpower Jake McCandless.

With hair the length of his body, Hippy sure likes to hit people - even when there's no game actually going on.

He's small. He's obnoxious. And he fights! This 4'9" monster doesn't go down easily.

Mr. Titzer obtained his name when the Squires lost their game with their most hated rivals. May the former coach R.I.P.

Mr. Horton received most of the playtime late in the 07-08 season of American football. He was the 2nd string for Ryan Schoenbachler's position, who was suspended for slipping large amount of Skink urine into the coach's coffee.

Quite tall for a Skink, The Tree is widely known for jumping up to five feet off of the ground to catch a stray ball.

The Shirtless Wonder is just that... his trademark is his tackling (or lack thereof) with no shirt on.

Piggies always seems to get picked on by the other players (and the coach). In American football he was the quarterback, though he was never very good because of his short Skink arms.