I do not wish to be hateful, mean, or arrogant here, but I must be blunt regarding Megatokyo's author. Fred Gallagher is the whiniest, most hypocritical anime webcomic artist there is. When he's not attempting to "protect" his characters from being made into porn, he's drawing porn of them himself. He shares this tendency with Eric W. Schwartz. Who is Eric Schwartz? That perverted furry that draws Sabrina Online. Therefore, in this regard, Gallagher is as bad as not only the worst anime artists, but the worst erotic furry artists as well.

In fact, I would actually put many erotic furry artists above Gallagher. At least erotic furry artists are (sometimes) honest about their work being porn, and generally make no bones about the sexuality therein. In stark, shameful contrast, Gallagher actively hides pornography he's drawn of his characters from the judgmental eyes of the rest of the world, and what's more he does a poor job of it, with a good deal of it residing on a publicly-accessible portion of his website Fredart.com, in a section titled "Blurred", linked at the end of this review. Many erotic furry artists are less annoying, less whiny, and more willing to accept criticism of their work than Gallagher is. Most are also better at drawing, better at inking, better at coloring, and better at every facet of comic art design than Fred Gallagher is. For a reasonably famous anime artist, I find Gallagher's lack of finesse shameful.

The first thing you'll notice about the art in Gallagher's comic is that his characters do not have tongues or detailed, three-dimensional mouths. Rather, they have two-dimensional shapes where their mouths should go. The second thing you'll notice is that all of his characters have the same basic style: Not enough detail in some places, too much detail in others. His eyes look like a four-year old's on the females in his comic, regardless of age. The males look the same as the females in all appreciable ways, save for the eyes, which are beady and incomplete-looking. Gallagher's side profiles almost invariably have snoutface, a trait of American manga-kas who try way too hard to imitate Japanese cartoons.

In short, unless Gallagher has some kind of cognitive mental disorder, there is no reason for his wispy, irregular pencil strokes, inability to ink his comic, inability to draw three-dimensional mouths, and inability to stop imitating anime artists in every way possible, excepting their best qualities. Notice that the linked drawing does not have snoutface. Apply that to the rest of your comic, please, Mr. Gallagher, as most of your work lacks that facial detailing, and should not. Well, hell, although I guess you're just slavishly imitating Japanese artists, right, so you can appease your Japanophile fanbase? And they'd leave if it didn't have that inherently Japanese look? I guess you've painted yourself into a corner. Great job.

Hathor the Cow Goddess (aka Heather Cushman-Dowdee) is a hippie, liberal, commie, helicopter mom of epic proportions. She shits out comic strips about, well...

These comic strips consist of Hathor (Heather with a cow mask), her children (one of them a baby constantly sucking on Hathor's tit), and her husband, who is always depicted wearing a mask, probably to hide his shame. Through these God awfully drawn piles of child abusing shit, Hathor manages to give other leftist hippie mothers (and their eunuch husbands) advice on all sorts of proper parenting techniques such as co-sleeping, breastfeeding in public, home births, unschooling, and NEVER LETTING YOUR KIDS OUT OF YOUR SIGHT EVAR!!! She also preaches feminist, nature oriented hippie politics and makes attacks on devil institutions such as doctors, scientists, and republicans. She disgusts even 4chan. Did we mention that she's been making this webcomic for nine years now?

PvP is as bland as Kurtz is huge which makes it very fuckin' bland. It's basically Garfield, with all that comparison implies. Despite some improvements in the art, it's been the same old weak gag strip that barely raises a chuckle, the kind that newspapers cream their jeans about getting on their "funnies" page. Which is pretty fucking laughable, since Kurtz hasn't even managed to give away this fucking cesspit. Maybe it's the videogame thing? Hardly, since nobody ever mentions videogames anymore. The slim veneer of "gaming webcomic" that it held at the start has been dropped, forgotten and ignored. You could say PvP should now stand for Pedestrian, vacant People instead. Only they're not all people! There's a giant blue guy who is The Stupid One and a talking cat who is either The Brain or Stewie Griffin depending on whether you like fantastic cartoons or terrible cartoons.

Back to the writing. You've basically got a bunch of two-dimensional archetypes. There's The Stupid One, like I said, and The Snarky One who is the comic foil for The Stupid One. The Long-Suffering Female, The Boss, The Child - these are not just simple labels, these are the entirety of their personalities. Brent is an art guy, he uses Apple stuff, he loves Apple stuff, oh God he can't get enough Apple stuff, lmao give me an iPhone, p.s. i love coffee and I always wear sunglasses ART MAC FAG.

There's a long list of things that should be grounds for murder, but sadly, aren't. Among these are referring to a webcomic as "online" in its title, calling your webcomic "an Internet tradition" because you were the first person stupid enough to post your glorified Looney Tunes porn on the Internet, posting said work on your site as a jaggedy, messed-up looking monochrome bitmap, making your principal character a full-grown nerd skunk with a shirt but no pants, making jokes about the character's lacking pants, and putting said skunk in a job at a porno studio. Indeed, Sabrina-Online commits all these sins.

Let's say Sabrina-Online had a "downfall" besides its very inception. That would be when Eric W. Schwartz founded his furry porn site, Fur After Dark, which I consider his "artist's website" due to the fact that Schwartz is really just a furry pornographer.

Sabrina Online began as a boring comic about a boring character. The target audience was far too specific; you had to be a furry, love Amigas, hate macs, like your toast well done… Later (when the adventures-of-Sabrina's-shitty-Amiga were made less frequent) the audience became much more broad, as now all you needed to enjoy it was to be a furry and to enjoy big furry breasts.

But Sluggy Freelance is and always will be a bad webcomic. It has bad art, bad writing (despite a few good jokes and a few more good jokes that were turned into terrible jokes by overplaying them) and almost three hundred thousand words of backstory for you to enjoy before you even come close to understanding what the fuck is happening. That's pretty much the hallmark of a bad webcomic. That's not to say that continuity and telling an ongoing story is bad, no, but Sluggy isn't doing that. It's weaving together a variety of parodies and, more lately, boringly over-wordy original crap into one incohesive whole. When you do a couple of weeks of strips that parody Star Trek and Alien, don't make it required reading for a storyline eight years later. Don't turn the Alien parody alien into a serious race with an all-original backstory. Just... just don't.

I really can't comprehend why webcomic jerks cannot simply end things. Why they can't say to themselves, "I have told all I can tell with these characters. Time for something new." Everyone else does it! Joss Whedon (whatever your opinion on him is) did not decide to send Buffy and her friends into space, he made Firefly. Why makes your webcomic any more special? What makes your amateur-hour shit worthy of going on and on and on until nobody cares anymore but you? Probably the fact that you are amateurs, I suppose. Take my advice: finish up, start something new and you'll see that people will prefer that to eight more years of switchblade-toting rabbits and tiring shit like that.

One hallmark of this is art style. If you look at the more recent characters in GPF -- Ki's parents, Mercedes De La Croix, and even Trent -- they're done in a cartoonish/Superhero style first seen in the Gamester and CRUDE. If, on the other hand, you look at Dwayne and Nick... and then go all the way back to the very first GPF strip, back in 1998... they look exactly the same. No pupils, wide circle eyes, Nick's ridiculous pontoon boat feet.... as a result, it looks like General Protection Fault is currently set in Toontown, where realistic human beings walk by Bugs Bunny and Mickey Mouse, and we're supposed to just accept that this is the way things are. For another... critical stupidity on the part of the cast that we could forgive when the whole thing was just a lighthearted romp becomes criminal in the post-CRUDE battle world. When Dwayne, whose willing blindness over Trudy literally cost him his business, got him thrown into prison for insurance fraud and arson, and who ultimately had to fight for his life and the lives of the world, decides to hire Trent -- an equally unctuous marketing director who once literally tried to drop a safe onto Dwayne's head, it doesn't make the reader think comedic hijinks will ensure. It makes us think that Dwayne is retarded and has no business owning a business, and one day his daughter Sydney will be wandering the streets, destitute and doing horrible things to survive. And sure enough, Trent is now suing GPF pretty much because he's a bastard, period. We leap over to Trudy on the run, and God help me it's compelling. It's sometimes beautiful -- one really gets the sense of a dark soul reaching for the light, living in the Hell she has created... and then we have a series of strips that parodies the Matrix for no good reason.

And then, there's Nick and Ki.

God help me, there's Nick and Ki.

There is no longer even the slightest glimmer of tension between Nick and Ki. There was once, when there was Trudy in the mix. But Nick made his choice. Tension over. Back before Surreptitious Machinations, there was a truly ham handed attempt to add "sexual tension" when Ki, seeing Nicole pregnant, had her "womb twinge" and nearly went nuts trying to get Nick to fill her full of baby. (Yeah. I think I read that story on Alt.Sex.Stories when I was twenty-two too. It disturbed me then, too. And that was... Jesus, that many years ago?) Now, they're virgins by choice (well, at least they're not having sex with each other. Ki used to go without panties while wearing skirts -- I have to assume she wasn't a nun) and have settled into the most boring routines of marriage -- sexless, joyless connection for years and years and years. This culminated, as you the readers know, with Nick finally asking Ki to marry him in the most pathetically afterschool special-ist plotline ever conceived in a webcomic. Ki's father, who has been a stubborn xenophobe all her life (he still calls her by the name he wanted to name her) proves to be a racist bastard, literally assaulting Nick when he asks for Ki's hand and sending him to the hospital. Then, Ki goes in, has about five minutes of arguing with her father... and he completely reforms, apologizes to Nick, gives his consent and blessing and accepts Nick into the family. It was literally minute twenty seven of a television sitcom and we needed to have Jan Brady learn the true meaning of being a sister, in time to be all better!

(Through this whole plotline, Darlington protested to people responding badly to Oshiro's literally terrible characterization by saying that the plot wasn't over yet -- give it time! Honestly! Only the payoff was simply a setup to let Trudy see Nick propose to Ki... and then leave, in tears, without even swearing revenge. In other words, it was Surreptitious Machinations all over again -- "come on back when the plotline is over! You'll see then!" Only we didn't see anything.)

As a final insult to my intelligence and an almost fatal blow to my love of humanity, Chugworth Academy is ... well ... what do you call a guy who draws hyper-sexualised, slutty and very definitely underage girls? Come on! They're even wearing school uniforms in half of these! How much more blatant can you get?

Cheung also sticks a childish face on a well-defined teenage body and the endows the resulting abomination with the mind of a five-year-old. And he lets us know the truth about blonde women who are able to get jobs: it's because they're hot and stupid and willing to be spanked by someone who'll pay them.

The word for people like this is "creep". If you're me, that word's turned into a phrase: "motherfucking creepy pervert who should be taken behind the barn and shot in the balls". Reading Chugworth and seeing all those cutsey, childish faces juxaposed with pantyshots, cleavage and almost endless fucking makes me uncomfortable. It makes me feel like I'm committing a crime simply by giving this fuckstick's site any hits. I mean, check out his deviantArt gallery (warning: NSFW, but you should know that already from reading this review and having two braincells to rub together). It's full of nothing but extremely explicit pin-ups of his characters. His school-age female characters with faces like little kids. I hope this point really doesn't need to be driven home with a jackhammer.

User Friendly is a monstrous carbuncle upon the face of Creation. It is a fat, steaming turd that was dropped bodily into Eden by Satan's fiery dickhole. It is a gargantuan excrement that caused the flood, the death of the dinosaurs and evil itself. No, no - worse. It is a wart upon the Devil's own instrument, a bubonic pustule oozing thick, black pus and smelling like a hundred tons of shit in a one-ton shithouse. It is a wrinkled, decaying thing that is such a horror unto all living things that none can stomach even the knowledge of its existence, save for the festering maggots and lice that inhabit it, feeding from it and growing fat upon the slime and bile it produces.

Look at it. Fucking look at it. It is fucking terrible. You've got characters that are put together with the kind of grasp of basic human anatomy that's you'd expect a dim badger to have. The dialogue revolves around something that's supposed to be a joke based on management types being clueless. Only it reads more like programmer-types are the laziest, most worthless dregs of society you could imagine. He doesn't want to do his job! He's too busy playing video games! And he's the hero, not the comic relief! Ha ha ha! Ugh. It reads like Dilbert fanfiction.

Dominic Deegan is a webcomic so bad you'd think it was hosted on an ancient Indian burial ground. It's so unwaveringly terrible it might as well be a universal constant. It's so bad that it spoils milk. It's so bad that your computer will physically smell when you load the page, an aroma of brimstone, decaying meat and burning feces that will linger for days afterward. It is so bad that none of what I have just said does justice to how bad it is.

Dominic Deegan is a bad webcomic. It's so bad I have just spent two thousand words explaining how bad it is and I still have more to say about it - but perhaps another time. In the mean time, do not read Dominic Deegan. Reading it is a chore, much like scouring your eyes with wire wool and bleach, only not as fun. Worse, you may find yourself accidentally enjoying the comic, which should bring about the dull realization that you have no taste in writing, that you cannot discern pure shit from anything that's not pure shit, that you are a fucking idiot who likes Dominic Deegan and can never show their face in society again.

Just for laughs I'll say, once more, that Terracciano is so bad at writing I'm willing to compare him to a Goddamn child molester. However, he'll never know because this is criticism of his shitty work, and that means he'll never read it. He is content to be in his warm little bubble of ignorance, soaking in a pool of his own filth, blissfully unaware that his writing is some of the worst writing to ever exist in the entire universe.

If Ctrl+Alt+Del is the king of shitty gaming webcomics, then VG Cats is the scheming vizier with a sinister goatee, plotting to take the throne as all the pieces fall into place. It is trying, oh how it is trying, to be the worst fucking game-related webcomic in recorded history. It's aiming for that dubious title like the World fuckin' Series. Walk with me, reader, through the timeline of history as we uncover the twisted path that VG Cats has walked, the slow descent into the very sewers of the Internet and beyond.

So, why is it bad? Why, why, why. That's all you bitches ever want to know. I dream of a day when you accept my word as gospel. But all right, I'll indulge you one more time and explain in loving detail the crimes of VG Cats.

As evidence by the latest strip, Scott Ramsoomair is guilty of quite a few webcomic sins. Notice the cut-and-paste - you can tell it's trying to out-CAD CAD, can't you? You see, much as a maintained camera angle might be easy to do, it's boring. Throw in some closeups, change angle - a few small things like this will have people looking at your webcomic in a new light! There'll be dancing in the streets, ticker-tape parades, joy bestowed to all mankind! Except if your webcomic is VG Cats none of that will happen, because it'll still be VG Cats.

How to Edit a CAD Comic:
Step 1: Draw a Miscarriage
Step 2: Damn, That's a Fine Miscarriage
Step 3: B^U it

It's a good point that, should you ever find yourself accidentally looking at Ctrl+Alt+Del, the title also conveys what you should do: reboot your computer as fast as possible. Like Dominic Deegan, this is one of the worst webcomics on the entire Internet, and much in the same manner it is oddly popular amongst the mentally handicapped. If they ever manage to stumble upon these words, I can expect a comments page akin to a pack of hooting and shit-throwing monkeys. Much like the one in my entry about Deegan, although perhaps with less repressed sobbing.

Ctrl+Alt+Del is one of those awful webcomics which is simultaneously well-known and well-known for being awful. Sure, it has its fans, but unlike Deegan it has a number of folk who are actually aware of how bad it is. In case you are not one of those people, pay heed to my words and leave this place enlightened.

Open your mouth. Not all the way, just relax the muscles and let your jaw hang down. Stare straight ahead, and let your eyelids droop. Smoking a lot of weed might help you attain this pose. Now, imagine that you have to maintain this facial expression all day long.

Because from day fuckin' one to five fuckin' years later, that's all anyone ever does on CAD. Perhaps the corner of the mouth will twitch up in a cruel mockery of a smile, perhaps they will close their slack jaw out of a lack of inane shit to say. But that's CAD art, right there. Pronounce "CAD art" similar to "clip art" because they are brothers. Tim Buckley, the anus from which CAD is discharged, has worn his Ctrl, C and V keys down to a nub.

Like most, by which I mean all, gaming webcomics, CAD hopped on the Penny Arcade bandwagon as it was leaving. On this Oregon Trail of Internet shame, many webcomics died of dysentery. They starved after not shooting enough buffalo. But CAD, like other types of vermin, survived. No, it thrived. It accumulated fans like a plague victim accumulates pustules, and soon became a regular fixture in the morning routines of self-important retards everywhere.


Timothy William Buckley is the son of Maureen and Robert Buckley. Whist both are Irish going back to both their parents, neither of them would be considered so in context as they would have been American citizens for far longer. Yet Buckley claims he is Irish, and by default that means excessive drinking, being an arsehole to everyone and acting "funny" and "whacky".

Often a troublemaker at school and in his teens he has been arrested several times and has spent a few days or so in overnight stay.

Unable to hold a job he shifted through College and eventually dropped out. One day things came to a bit of a climax. A girl he'd been seeing was knocked up and suffered a miscarriage, Tim seeing this as the perfect excuse to break up used it to his full advantage, suffering backlash supreme in the process.

Seeing counseling he was suggested he'd start up something he likes, drawing. And thus CAD was born.

For Tim it was a chance to remake his life, on the internet, and hide away all of the poo poo he'd done in the past.

Between 2003 - 2005 CAD shot up in popularity in a rather surprising scale, and Tim's ego gorged itself on the hits and cash he was pulling in.

The hatred of CAD comes from this, the fact that a comic that relies on sloppy craftsmanship, very bland jokes and often dated and inaccurate references to video games is considered a popular comic.

But other issues quickly cropped up that made him the anti-christ of comics. His behavior at conventions was noted to be brash, unneeded authoritarian, pushing for sales and generally acting down to fans. He was quickly removed from convention invite lists and hasn't been to once since 2006.

The other bombshell was from the allegation that he really likes em young. Back before CAD he was known to openly hit on and engage over the internet girls around the ages of 14 - 16. This even resulted in him sending photos of his genitals.

Such a story was exposed on CAD's own forums and Tim's adamant and steadfast attempt to expunge any reference to it (including banning most of his fans) resulted in him gaining the reputation of being a sensitive callous wanker.

Other stories supporting this came from a poster in YCS who lived with Buckley for a while. She informed that he was stuck in his own world and refused to accept any fault or blame for his actions and that anyone else was merely against him. He also assaulted someone so that he wouldn't be distracted from his six hour binge at Soul Caliber in order to take out the garbage.

I don't think there's anything I could say, really, to dissuade Buckley from continuing his shitty comic or getting his circlejerk to stop circlejerking. But to you so far untainted, stay the fuck away from this webcomic.