The troll is easily Pactsonville's best big guy. He favors a simple game -- he likes hitting guys, and he loves hitting them again when they get up. He doesn't do much else, but does he need to?

A real bully, this one. Tony has raw talent, but he needs to learn to play under control if he wants the success he deserves.

An early star for the team, Clint is as adept at running in traffic as he is at squashing snotlings. In the team's NBFL debut, he was named MVP after dealing a first-turn casualty to a hapless wood elf lineman. He's not a flashy player, but he's an undeniably effective one.

A talented player, Garrard came out of nowhere to establish himself as a top scoring and passing threat. He's no great blocker, but when he gets the ball, odds are he'll do something good with it... and he gets the ball a lot.

Lewis tends to be a little overshadowed compared to the other offensive skill players on the team. He's not the passer Garrard is, he's not as flashy as MOJO, and he doesn't have Slaaneshion's unique combination of bruising hits and TD runs. But when he is called upon to do something, he does it well. He's probably the team's most underrated contributor.

A fan favorite for his hard hits, Tzurk can push a lot of guys around. He's not the most skilled player, but he gets by.

Mark is a backup QB for the team, who's shown decent scrambling ability but hasn't distinguished himself much beyond that.

More a mascot than an actual player, Gobbert hasn't even seen the field in almost half of the team's games. He's got some decent moves out there, but his general lack of durability makes him notably problematic.