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Max Fischer II
#1
Head Carver
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
11
B
2
P
0
F
0
G
1
Cp
1
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
1
XPP
0
SPP
1
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
I saved Latin. What did you ever do?
Dr. Nelson Guggenheim
#2
Chaos Spawn
MA
5
ST
5
AG
2
AV
8
R
0
B
26
P
0
F
0
G
5
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
3
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
6
XPP
0
SPP
6
Injuries
Skills
Always Hungry
Frenzy
Horns
Loner
Mighty Blow
Regeneration
Thick Skull
Throw Team-Mate
Wild Animal
Block
We're putting you on what we call sudden death academic probation.
Herman Blume
#3
Carver
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
5
R
0
B
12
P
0
F
3
G
4
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
2
XPP
0
SPP
2
Injuries
-av
Skills
Chainsaw
Dodge
Right Stuff
Secret Weapon
Yeah, I was in the shit.
Dirk Calloway
#4
Carver
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
0
B
11
P
0
F
3
G
4
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
0
XPP
0
SPP
0
Injuries
Skills
Chainsaw
Dodge
Right Stuff
Secret Weapon
(in a letter written in crayon)
Dear Max,
I am sorry to say that I have secretly found out that Mr. Blume is having an affair with Miss Cross. My first suspicions came when I saw them Frenching in front of our house. And then I knew for sure when they went skinny dipping in Mr. Blume's swimming pool, giving each other handjobs while you were taking a nap on the front porch.
Your Friend,
Dirk
Mr. Little Jeans
#5
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
7
B
6
P
0
F
0
G
5
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
2
XPP
0
SPP
2
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Best play ever, man.
Rosemary Cross
#6
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
2
B
11
P
3
F
1
G
5
Cp
1
In
0
Cs
1
Td
1
Mvp
2
GPP
16
XPP
0
SPP
16
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Claw
Side Step
Do you think we're going to have sex?
Dr. Peter Flynn
#7
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
24
B
11
P
0
F
0
G
4
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
1
Mvp
0
GPP
5
XPP
0
SPP
5
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
These are OR scrubs.
(Oh, are they?)
(Oh, are they?)
Coach Beck
#8
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
0
B
10
P
0
F
0
G
5
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
2
XPP
0
SPP
2
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
This is my baseball field.
Bert FIscher
#9
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
39
B
10
P
0
F
0
G
5
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
2
Td
2
Mvp
2
GPP
20
XPP
0
SPP
20
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Big Hand
Two Heads
Are you fond of that mustache?
Serpico
#10
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
0
B
5
P
0
F
0
G
5
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
2
XPP
0
SPP
2
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Sheep dogs have been in my family... for sixteen generations! Dating back to the Borgias...The family crest... is the image of a sheep dog, pissing into a gondola.
Magnus Buchan
#11
Chaos Spawn
MA
5
ST
5
AG
2
AV
8
R
3
B
26
P
0
F
0
G
5
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
4
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
13
XPP
0
SPP
13
Injuries
Skills
Always Hungry
Frenzy
Horns
Loner
Mighty Blow
Regeneration
Thick Skull
Throw Team-Mate
Wild Animal
Foul Appearance
Why dincha just piss off, Fischer? Ya dotty wee skid mark!
Margaret Yang
#12
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
0
B
5
P
0
F
0
G
3
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
0
XPP
0
SPP
0
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
You're a real jerk to me, you know that?
Donny Blume
#15
Chaos Halfling
MA
5
ST
2
AG
3
AV
6
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
0
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
0
XPP
0
SPP
0
Injuries
Skills
Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
"How are Ronny and Donny enjoying military school?"