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XKCDwarves
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Standards
#1
Troll Slayer
MA
5
ST
3
AG
2
AV
8
R
0
B
3
P
0
F
0
G
2
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
5
XPP
0
SPP
5
Injuries
Skills
Block
Dauntless
Frenzy
Thick Skull
Whites of Their Eyes
#2
Troll Slayer
MA
6
ST
3
AG
2
AV
8
R
11
B
80
P
0
F
0
G
12
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
6
Td
1
Mvp
1
GPP
20
XPP
0
SPP
20
Injuries
m
Skills
Block
Dauntless
Frenzy
Thick Skull
+MA (30k)
Mighty Blow (20k)
Don't fire until you see through the fragile facade to the human being within.
The Difference
#3
Blitzer
MA
5
ST
3
AG
3
AV
9
R
35
B
50
P
0
F
0
G
12
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
4
Td
6
Mvp
1
GPP
31
XPP
0
SPP
31
Injuries
Skills
Block
Thick Skull
Dodge (30k)
Guard (20k)
Stand Firm (20k)
How could you choose avoiding a little pain over understanding a magic lightning machine?
TornadoGuard
#4
Blitzer
MA
5
ST
3
AG
3
AV
9
R
25
B
55
P
0
F
0
G
12
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
2
Mvp
0
GPP
8
XPP
0
SPP
8
Injuries
Skills
Block
Thick Skull
Guard (20k)
The bug report was marked 'could not reproduce'.
Duty Calls
#5
Runner
MA
6
ST
3
AG
3
AV
8
R
34
B
24
P
0
F
0
G
12
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
2
Mvp
1
GPP
13
XPP
0
SPP
13
Injuries
Skills
Sure Hands
Thick Skull
Wrestle (20k)
What do you want me to do? LEAVE? Then they'll keep being wrong!
Flow Charts
#6
Runner
MA
6
ST
3
AG
3
AV
8
R
221
B
36
P
9
F
0
G
12
Cp
3
In
0
Cs
0
Td
8
Mvp
1
GPP
32
XPP
0
SPP
32
Injuries
Skills
Sure Hands
Thick Skull
Block (20k)
Dodge (30k)
Tackle (20k)
At 8 drinks, you switch the torrent from FreeBSD to Microsoft Bob. C'mon, it'll be fun!
Pwned
#7
Blocker
MA
4
ST
4
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
94
P
0
F
0
G
12
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
4
GPP
22
XPP
0
SPP
22
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
+ST (50k)
Guard (20k)
I'm sure a discussion of the reason for the disappearance of adventure games in favor of RPGs would be fascinating
Purity
#8
Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
52
P
0
F
0
G
11
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
0
XPP
0
SPP
0
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
On the other hand, physicists like to say physics is to math as sex is to masturbation.
Significant
#9
Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
57
P
0
F
0
G
12
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
7
XPP
0
SPP
7
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Stand Firm (20k)
'So, uh, we did the green study again and got no link. It was probably a--' 'RESEARCH CONFLICTED ON GREEN JELLY BEAN/ACNE LINK; MORE STUDY RECOMMENDED!'
Orbiter
#10
Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
51
P
0
F
0
G
10
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
1
Td
0
Mvp
1
GPP
7
XPP
0
SPP
7
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Guard (20k)
Normally, the Shuttle can't quite safely reach the orbital inclination required to pass over both those points from a Canaveral launch, but this is an alternate history in which either it launches from Vandenberg or everyone hates the Outer Banks.
Explorers
#11
Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
3
B
50
P
0
F
0
G
11
Cp
0
In
1
Cs
4
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
10
XPP
0
SPP
10
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Guard (20k)
We're going to have to work together to get over our hangups if we're going to learn to move on Catan's hexagonal grid. It's bad enough that we lost our crew of pawns when we passed within firing range of Battleship.
Archimedes
#12
Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
7
P
0
F
0
G
3
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
0
XPP
0
SPP
0
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull
Laser Scope
#13
Blocker
MA
4
ST
3
AG
2
AV
9
R
0
B
0
P
0
F
0
G
0
Cp
0
In
0
Cs
0
Td
0
Mvp
0
GPP
0
XPP
0
SPP
0
Injuries
Skills
Block
Tackle
Thick Skull