St Mary's church in the hollow of the white hazel near to the fierce whirlpool and the church of St Tysilio of the red cave.

Picture the scene: The other fuckin' week there, down the fuckin' Volley with Tommy, playing pool. I'm playing like Paul-Fuckin'-Newman by the way. Givin' the boy here the tannin' of a lifetime. So it comes to the, down to the last shot, the deciding ball of the whole tournament. I'm on the black and he's sittin' in the corner looking all fuckin' biscuit-arsed. When this hard cunt comes in. Obviously fuckin' fancies himself, like. Starts staring at me. Lookin' at me, right fuckin' at me, as if to say, "Come ahead, square go." You ken me, I'm not the type of cunt that goes looking for fuckin' bother, like, but at the end of the day I'm the cunt with a pool cue and he can get the fat end in his puss any time he fucking wanted like. So I squares up, casual like. What does the hard cunt do? Or the so-called hard cunt? Shites it. Puts down his drink, turns, and gets the fuck out of there. And after that, well, the game was mine.

Kikiki! Kakaka!
Kauana kei waniwania taku tara
kei tarawahia, kei te rua i te kerokero!
He pounga rahui te uira
ka rarapa ketekete kau ana
To peru kairiri mau au e koro e!
Hi! Ha! - Ka wehi au ka matakana,
ko wai te tangata kia rere ure tirohanga
nga rua rerarera
nga rua kuri kakanui i raro! Aha ha!

Ka mate, ka mate! ka ora! ka ora!
Ka mate! ka mate! ka ora! ka ora!
Tenei te tangata puhuruhuru
Nana nei i tiki mai whakawhiti te ra
A, upane! ka upane!
A, upane, ka upane, whiti te ra!

A guest is a gift from God except Russians who are a gift from the devil

When things go wrong and will not come right,
Though you do the best you can,
When life looks black as the hour of night –
A pint of plain is your only man.

When money’s tight and hard to get
And your horse has also ran,
When all you have is a heap of debt –
A pint of plain is your only man.

When health is bad and your heart feels strange,
And your face is pale and wan,
When doctors say you need a change,
A pint of plain is your only man.

When food is scarce and your larder bare
And no rashers grease your pan,
When hunger grows as your meals are rare –
A pint of plain is your only man.

In time of trouble and lousey strife,
You have still got a darlint plan
You still can turn to a brighter life –
A pint of plain is your only man.

It's coming home

LIZARDON, DORAGON CRO!

Just walking on crops and... crapping on crops and... crapping on walks and... cropping on craps and... crapping on docks and... captain on the rocks. You get the idea.

H982 FKL

"Babbelaas", You know that feeling after a heavy night out on the town? South Africa offers a term that is far more descriptive of one's feeling of complete and utter uselessness!

Je suis Charlie