“"That's the absolute worst I've ever seen us play. The first half was atrocious. That was Stinky-level of play! That was below Stinky-level of play! What am I saying, that was below three-blue-collared-goblins-alone-with-the-ball-and-no-opponents-around-and-they-can't-pick-it-up level of play! I don't want to see anything like it EVER AGAIN!"
---Gunn, Dark Age Outlaws Lineboy

"In that case, I suggest you drink another flask or two of this spiked wine. Whatever poison they put in it, it's strong stuff. Blinding strong stuff. A few drinks more and your eyes won't do you any good for the rest of your short, miserable, constipated life."
---Armon Gale, Dark Age Outlaws Blitzer

"Fortunately we sobered up for the second half and turned it around with my touchdown and were back to our usual flawless self in time to produce a unstoppable, unbeatable offense. Nonetheless, it's a good idea to lay off the drinks before important games in the future."
---Yohn, Dark Age Outlaws Lineboy

"First you take away my women, now you take away my wine too? You're taking all fun out of life. What's next? No women, no wine... next you tell me no crime, too?"
---Jaymez, Dark Age Outlaws Lineboy (MVP)

"You heard the man, boys. Next seasons championship will be celebrated after the last game and not one minute earlier."
---Eden Price, Dark Age Outlaws Blitzer

"That'll be a boring few games after we've won our championship three or four games early."
---Byll, Dark Age Outlaws Lineboy”