18 coaches online • Server time: 07:20
* * * Did you know? The best interceptor is Leena with 22 interceptions.
Recent Forum Topics  Are Trolls on the Go... | Triggering Wrestle b... | O[L]C Sprint + Tourn... |
Almighty Malachi
#1
Thrower
MA
4
ST
3
AG
5
AV
7
R
-12
B
21
P
385
F
7
G
35
Cp
53
In
0
Cs
3
Td
1
Mvp
5
GPP
87
XPP
0
SPP
87
Injuries
-ma, -ma
Skills
Pass
+AG
Accurate
Kick-Off Return
Leader
Strong Arm
Almighty Malachi of the Mackville, WI Pro Bowlers has finished his assault on the single season passing record. An incomparable last three games where he totaled 6 completions for 48 yards! Malachi's unbreakable record will remain at Twenty-Three completions for 167 yards. He reached his goal of 7.3 yards per pass. And that is a final score of 213!!!
You watch me on your TV.
Say that my job is easy.
Say I am not athletic.
You think my sport's pathetic.
But you can't judge me 'till you walked a mile in my bowling shoes.
So I don't get all the ladies.
Gotta mullet from the 80's
I am known throughout the valleys.
As the prophet of alleys.
And as I roll the ball I cry, "Let me bowl or let me die!"
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling god.
The smell of resin gets my high.
Kiss those fucking pins goodbye!
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling... the bowling... god.
Got a ball that's smooth and all black.
I keep it in my lucky ball sack.
I get a feeling in my soul.
As I finger every hole.
And as I roll the ball I cry, "Let me bowl or let me die!"
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling god.
The smell of resin gets my high.
Kiss those motherfucking pins goodbye!
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling... bowling...
Not a single man will try, to beat Almighty Malachi.
All who challenge me are slain.
Come on, fuckers, pick a lane.
Marshall Holden, Gary Dickens, get in line for your ass kickins'.
John Patraglia, Norm Duke, your so lame it makes me puke.
Who among the pro-bowl sector.
Dares to don his wrist protector.
Not that pussy Nelson Burton, tells me that his wrist is hurtin'.
Hey my prophet, Earl the Pearl, are ya' scared to give the ball a hurl?
How bout' Dicky Weber and his son Pete? I'll turn the motherfuckers to cream of wheat!
And as I roll the ball I cry, "Let me bowl or let me die!"
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling god.
The smell of resin gets my high.
Kiss those fucking pins goodbye!
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling... bowling god!!
Yeaaaaaaah!
The bowling god!
You watch me on your TV.
Say that my job is easy.
Say I am not athletic.
You think my sport's pathetic.
But you can't judge me 'till you walked a mile in my bowling shoes.
So I don't get all the ladies.
Gotta mullet from the 80's
I am known throughout the valleys.
As the prophet of alleys.
And as I roll the ball I cry, "Let me bowl or let me die!"
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling god.
The smell of resin gets my high.
Kiss those fucking pins goodbye!
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling... the bowling... god.
Got a ball that's smooth and all black.
I keep it in my lucky ball sack.
I get a feeling in my soul.
As I finger every hole.
And as I roll the ball I cry, "Let me bowl or let me die!"
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling god.
The smell of resin gets my high.
Kiss those motherfucking pins goodbye!
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling... bowling...
Not a single man will try, to beat Almighty Malachi.
All who challenge me are slain.
Come on, fuckers, pick a lane.
Marshall Holden, Gary Dickens, get in line for your ass kickins'.
John Patraglia, Norm Duke, your so lame it makes me puke.
Who among the pro-bowl sector.
Dares to don his wrist protector.
Not that pussy Nelson Burton, tells me that his wrist is hurtin'.
Hey my prophet, Earl the Pearl, are ya' scared to give the ball a hurl?
How bout' Dicky Weber and his son Pete? I'll turn the motherfuckers to cream of wheat!
And as I roll the ball I cry, "Let me bowl or let me die!"
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling god.
The smell of resin gets my high.
Kiss those fucking pins goodbye!
I'm Almighty Malachi, the bowling... bowling god!!
Yeaaaaaaah!
The bowling god!
Match performances
Date
Opponent
Comp
TD
Int
Cas
Mvp
Spp
2013-07-02
1
-
-
1
-
3
2013-07-10
1
-
-
1
-
3
2013-07-17
3
-
-
-
-
3
2013-07-24
1
-
-
-
-
1
2013-08-27
1
-
-
-
-
1
2013-09-13
2
-
-
-
-
2
2013-09-24
2
-
-
-
-
2
2013-10-02
1
-
-
-
-
1
2013-10-15
2
-
-
-
1
7
2013-10-17
1
-
-
-
-
1
2013-11-06
2
-
-
-
-
2
2013-11-07
2
-
-
-
-
2
2013-11-16
3
-
-
-
-
3
2013-11-28
2
-
-
-
-
2
2013-12-07
2
-
-
-
-
2
2013-12-20
3
-
-
-
-
3
2013-12-30
1
-
-
-
-
1
2014-08-19
2
-
-
-
-
2
2014-09-11
-
-
-
-
1
5
2014-09-16
3
-
-
-
-
3
2014-09-25
2
-
-
-
-
2
2014-09-27
1
-
-
-
-
1
2014-09-30
-
-
-
-
1
5
2014-10-21
3
-
-
-
1
8
2014-11-07
3
-
-
-
-
3
2014-11-12
-
1
-
-
-
3
2014-11-18
1
-
-
-
-
1
2014-11-26
3
-
-
-
-
3
2014-12-04
2
-
-
-
1
7
2014-12-10
2
-
-
-
-
2
2014-12-14
1
-
-
-
-
1
2015-01-26
-
-
-
1
-
2