Despite making a strong start the Bruins are widely held to have the most pathetic Norse forward line ever. So far their two weres and berserker have failed to cause a single casualty in 136 blocks, or indeed achieve anything else of note! Disgruntled fans now routinely throw teddy bears and flowers at them before a match, and headcoach DrDeath is trying to bolster their confidence by pushing small kittens around in training. Thankfully fans can instead enjoy watching Jarl Guthrum the Tall, a runner of such promise he has saved the day single-handedly on many occasions - quite literally as the arrogant git carries a horn of mead in the other!

Update: Ulfwerenar Ake 'Beartooth' Faason was later killed against the Bargain Bin Blitzers (which frankly came as something of a relief to disgruntled fans). Denied Valhalla for being so utterly useless, he was raised as a zombie by the Undead team... where the useless git still hasn't achieved ANYTHING! There are rumours that he was in fact a werekitten all along. The other forwards have finally inflicted, well, a couple of knocks and DrDeath has upgraded their training to small puppies.