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2024-10-26 01:31:05
2 votes, rating 6
2 votes, rating 6
Spotlight on the Midlothians: An Interview with Galethe Jorad
Host: Hey there folks and welcome to Spotlight, your power hour for all the blood bowl news. At the beginning of the season we talked about Coach Oryx' controversial decision to keep Davanandro And https://fumbbl.com/p/player?player_id=16206272 on the books, despite his unusual playstyle. We're here today to follow up and ask Coach Oryx his plans for next season. The midlothians have a very Mid record thus far, with 2 wins/2 losses going into a brutal week five against one of the overall favorites to advance to gold, Coach Cervus' Coal Butte Boozers. Midlothians have got plenty of bodies but they're giving up some very nice inducements and will be missing their new kicker to boot! Coach Oryx gave us the cold shoulder when we asked for an interview, but we were able to secure a slot with the Midlothians other star blitzer, Galethe Jorad. https://fumbbl.com/p/player?player_id=16206271
Thanks for being with us tonight, Galethe.
GJ: Yes, yes, well, it's about time someone requested an interview. You all know that I'm not just the other star blitzer - I'm the only star blitzer on this team. You know that, right?
Host (chuckling): Is that so? I have it on good authority that Davanandro And has quite the following! Merchandise sales for his jersey have risen 1600% in the last month, and rumor is that he's got no less than three sponsorship offers on the table. If that doesn't make him a star blitzer I don't know what does! In fact, I... What's that? This just in folks, the final results from the "Down and Dirty with Davanandro" Kickstarter campaign have come in. One lucky donor amongst those who contributed over 1500 garc coins was chosen to have a sitdown dinner with Davanandro and a rare opportunity to get gang fouled by And and the cheerleading squad. Congratulations to wintergreen13 on your lucky prize! I don't know about you, Galethe, but people paying 1500 garc coins for the chance to get fouled by you personally? Seems to have "star blitzer" written all over it.
GJ: The words you're looking for are "arrogant charlatan." Star blitzer? 4 games this season and what does he have to show for it? 1 casualty and a lot of turns spent lying on the ground trying to pose for the cameras. Look I told him at the start; all you have to do is learn how to assist me no matter what. The coaching staff taught me how to tackle first, they taught me how to go all the way and never give up, and where's my backup? Lying on the ground grinning like a fool! Fouling is lineman duty, not star blitzer territory. He doesn't even train anymore, just sits around listening to death metal and dm'ing fan girls from tik tok.
Host: Harsh words from Galethe Jorad! for someone who has no touchdowns and only 2 casualties in the first four games, those are some big claims! Surely you understand the blood bowl is about the showmanship as much as it is about winning. Those jerseys aren't going to sell themselves! Can you really say you're doing more to keep the midlothians successful than Davanandro And?
GJ, growing visibly angry: Ya think? Maybe if I had an actual partner instead of a lazy self obsessed emo clown I'd have something to show for this season. Last season we were the terror of the division! We beat basically everyone! We had one of the top offenses in the entire league, with me at the forefront. I did that work, I made that happen! This season we're a meme, a joke, a pathetic circus pretending to be a blood bowl club.
Host: Here now, at a lifetime record of 4 td's, 2 casualties, 2 mvp's, 2 completions, he's really not that far behind you at 7 td's, 6 casualties, 2 completions. In fact in terms of being a valuable player, I'd say he's quite far ahead of you (snickers at his own joke). Who knows, maybe you'll be the one who ends up as a free agent come next redraft?
GJ, turning beet red in the face and screaming: I don't have to take this @#$$#%^! What'd he even get mvp for, taking a #@$%$#^ Q#$@%@#$% nap? This is 532#$%#@$% !@#$!@#$ on #$!@#$ and $@!#$ I 2%%#$@! !@#$~! I'll @#$!@#$ your @#$ !@#$!@#$! I'll -!
(GJ lunges at the host, and the camera cuts out)
And that's all we've got for today folks. Let's all give GJ a round of applause - thanks for letting us in on the current goings on inside the Heartless Midlothians FC. Until next time... =D
Thanks for being with us tonight, Galethe.
GJ: Yes, yes, well, it's about time someone requested an interview. You all know that I'm not just the other star blitzer - I'm the only star blitzer on this team. You know that, right?
Host (chuckling): Is that so? I have it on good authority that Davanandro And has quite the following! Merchandise sales for his jersey have risen 1600% in the last month, and rumor is that he's got no less than three sponsorship offers on the table. If that doesn't make him a star blitzer I don't know what does! In fact, I... What's that? This just in folks, the final results from the "Down and Dirty with Davanandro" Kickstarter campaign have come in. One lucky donor amongst those who contributed over 1500 garc coins was chosen to have a sitdown dinner with Davanandro and a rare opportunity to get gang fouled by And and the cheerleading squad. Congratulations to wintergreen13 on your lucky prize! I don't know about you, Galethe, but people paying 1500 garc coins for the chance to get fouled by you personally? Seems to have "star blitzer" written all over it.
GJ: The words you're looking for are "arrogant charlatan." Star blitzer? 4 games this season and what does he have to show for it? 1 casualty and a lot of turns spent lying on the ground trying to pose for the cameras. Look I told him at the start; all you have to do is learn how to assist me no matter what. The coaching staff taught me how to tackle first, they taught me how to go all the way and never give up, and where's my backup? Lying on the ground grinning like a fool! Fouling is lineman duty, not star blitzer territory. He doesn't even train anymore, just sits around listening to death metal and dm'ing fan girls from tik tok.
Host: Harsh words from Galethe Jorad! for someone who has no touchdowns and only 2 casualties in the first four games, those are some big claims! Surely you understand the blood bowl is about the showmanship as much as it is about winning. Those jerseys aren't going to sell themselves! Can you really say you're doing more to keep the midlothians successful than Davanandro And?
GJ, growing visibly angry: Ya think? Maybe if I had an actual partner instead of a lazy self obsessed emo clown I'd have something to show for this season. Last season we were the terror of the division! We beat basically everyone! We had one of the top offenses in the entire league, with me at the forefront. I did that work, I made that happen! This season we're a meme, a joke, a pathetic circus pretending to be a blood bowl club.
Host: Here now, at a lifetime record of 4 td's, 2 casualties, 2 mvp's, 2 completions, he's really not that far behind you at 7 td's, 6 casualties, 2 completions. In fact in terms of being a valuable player, I'd say he's quite far ahead of you (snickers at his own joke). Who knows, maybe you'll be the one who ends up as a free agent come next redraft?
GJ, turning beet red in the face and screaming: I don't have to take this @#$$#%^! What'd he even get mvp for, taking a #@$%$#^ Q#$@%@#$% nap? This is 532#$%#@$% !@#$!@#$ on #$!@#$ and $@!#$ I 2%%#$@! !@#$~! I'll @#$!@#$ your @#$ !@#$!@#$! I'll -!
(GJ lunges at the host, and the camera cuts out)
And that's all we've got for today folks. Let's all give GJ a round of applause - thanks for letting us in on the current goings on inside the Heartless Midlothians FC. Until next time... =D
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