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NBFL Season 33: Chic...

Build big, long live...

'Cawwww Cawwww' rasped the crows and buzzards as they decended upon the offerings of dead flesh. The mangled remains of once proud warriors now strewn along the blood soaked rocks of Black Fire Pass, a feast of flesh for the mountains dark denizens. The battle had been a massive fight between a Dwarven army heading north to resupply Barak Varn and the remanants of a once mighty Greenskin invasion force, which was decimated when cornered in the Mootlands, was winding their way back to their dank and slightly smelly camp in the mountains. The greenskins, under the dubious leadership of Marth Hedstrom, had stumbled into the resting Dwarves and had immediately charged into battle. The fight raged for hours as the heroic dwarves sought out a weak point in the orcish horde, while the sheer ferocity and power of the orcs were beginning to overwhelm and wear down the dwarven lines. Seeing all was lost, the dwarven commander ordered the runes of immoliation be struck upon the mighty cannons in a desperate bid to decimate the remaining orcs. Yet unknown to the commander, a couple of scheming gobbos were also nearing completion of an equally dastardly plan to blow up the dwarven artillery and had been sneaking gunpowder close to and around the ancient cannons! As the last barrel was slid into position, Gobbi, a rather dim-witted gobbo (which is saying a lot!) lights the length of rope leading to the barrels before noticing the rope is wet. "Oi Gibbi, whyz dis rope all iky" he whispered to the gobbo legging it for the trees. "Har Har dat was me idea... me put burnin stufz ta make it burn fasta" he yelled over one shoulder. "YA STOOPID GIT!! ITZ GONNA BLO..." KKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!! The resulting explosion lit up the darkening sky, sending broken and bloodied warriors from both sides high in the air, the most spectacular being the green blob which sailed high over the mountains before hitting a somewhat jagged portion of the cliff with a wet SPLAT! As the smoke cleared, the smell of death hung heavy in the air, with only a few painful groans echoing along the battlefield. Slowly dragging himself to his feet, Old One Eye, himself a grizzled veteran of many a bloody battle like this one, surveyed the nightmare situation surrounding him. As his steel-like gaze swept the landscape, he raising his bloodied axe in the air and bellowing "WWWWAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!". Soon further voices added to One Eyes victory roar and the survivors gathered around his imposing frame. "Wez ar dead 'ard ladz. Stoopid stumpies ar all deadz HAR HAR HAR" he grunted "coz of me ya ugli grot!" came a bellowing response as Marth Hedstrom came storming over to One Eye "and youz stole me victory celebra.. celib... ME VICTORY YELLING!!" he screamed as he poked a grotty finger into One Eyes chest. "YOUZ VICTORY?!?! Ya run'd away like a scardi grot wearin a gurlie dress HAR HAR HAR!!" One Eye roared back. "Iz told ya dat me mistook'd dat dress for me armour da wun time ya git!" Marth shot back. "Wez sick of youz girlie fightin!! Me is takin da ladz!!" One Eye bellowed to the immediate cheers of the remaining handful of greenskins. "Wez goin 'ome!" "HAR HAR HAR 'ome? 'ome is ova dem big mountains ya gobbos butt! How youz gonna get der with ..um...wun, too, fwee, for...er... well two hands wurf of ladz?? And wez got no loot neiver!!" Marth laughed One Eye stared murderously at Marth but couldn't think of a response when suddenly he noticed a group of surviving gobbos had become bored and begun an enthralling game of 'Bloody Toes'. The exciting game involved the gobbos with boots stamping on the feet of those without... a game that they had become so absorbed in that they hadn't noticed the one surviving Troll crashing through the trees in a vain and amusing attempt at being stealthy. The ugly brute gave a mighty roar and crashed into the yelping grots, sending the lucky ones flying in all directions whilst an unlucky one became the Trolls revolting entree meal. Chuckling to himself over the gobbos fate, One Eye turned from the grizly scene to look at his old Warchief with an evil glint in his eye and proclaimed "Wez gonna play BLOOD BOWL!!!!" and to the roar of the lads, he turned and started walking down the road back towards the Mootlands. Marth, suddenly surrounded by death and carnage and all alone but for a rather brave little grot who was eyeing off his bootless feet, turned and ran after the retreating lads. "er... need another player...?" "Ah Blood Bowl... how i despise you!!!!" These are the words regularly spoken by the Skummi Gitz coach 'One Eye' Whittaker after yet another snake eyes or a damned interception by a freaking Troll!!!!!!

		For					Against
Opponent	Race	TV	SPP	Cas	Gold	Score	TV	SPP	Cas	Gold	Gate
Rozzi	Norse	1000k	11	2/0/0	80k	0 - 2	1000k	17	1/1/0	80k	57k