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Xylophone Fun
Roster [R] Shambling Undead

Xylophones, you say? Yes! Xylophones! Xylophone Fun are exactly that - a merry band of famous and gifted xylophone players (and the Great Composer). They are Nuffle's gift to opposing coaches!

The first match, against Dussel-Dwarf, the gifted musicians were beset by ... well, dorfs, and POURING RAIN! Oh noes! One can't pick up the ball when there's so much rain streaming down one's delicate musician's hands! It was such a sad spectacle, that even the opposing coach ended up rooting for Ian Finkel picking up the ball. Eventually he didn't, but he got the Undead of the Match distinction for trying! It has to be said that dorfs are respectless to musicians, as one of them (and which one is impossible to recall, they all look alike with the beards and the groin sniffing height) smashed poor Harry Breuer's hand! No Xylophone playing for six weeks! It was pure torment!

The second match was against the chorfs of Westbo IF, a bunch of savages so unaccustomed to cultivated instruments like xylophones that they used the poor musicians harshly. They even killed the poor composer Camille Saint-Saëns, the heathens! Their cultural impoverishment was so blatant and their lack of taste so rankling to the senses that Bob Becker pretended to suffer a groin strain, fooling the uncouth chorfs, who seem to be aware that skeletons don't even have groins!

They played their third match against Angry TEEF, which is a swear in Dutch if I've ever heard one. The Angry TEEF were taking the whole thing too seriously, and a Blorc with a -AV from a foul didn't really improve matters. Lots of lack of fun ensued, and the coach didn't want to score TDs while listening to a beautiful, all xylophone arrangement of Liszt's Dance Macabre, so he ended with an extra strong, extra slow extra lino Orc and only two TDs.

Oh, even if you spell it out, some people won't understand that we accompany their TD scoring with massive xylophone soundtrack action! But the coach coaching Newtman team Conscience Team IV (who has no imagination for naming their players other than 'S1', 'Kink2', and 'Krox') was so greedy on the blocks that he forgot to score TDs! Could have easily had 5, ended with 2. The nimble percussionists ended the match playing a lovely arrangement of Ian Dury's 'What a Waste', rubbing it in.
New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
1
Teddy Brown
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
Sure Hands, Kick-Off Return
 n 11 6 1 0 0 2 19/31 80k
(40+40)k
  
2
Ian Finkel
Skeleton
5 3 2 8
Regeneration, Thick Skull
+AV
   11 0 0 0 2 1 9/16 70k
(40+30)k
  
3
Stephen Whittaker
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   2 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
4
Ian Finkel
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
Block
   12 0 0 0 1 2 12/16 60k
(40+20)k
  
5
Kakraba Lobi
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   12 0 0 0 0 1 5/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
6
George Hamilton Green
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
Dirty Player
   12 0 0 0 2 1 9/16 60k
(40+20)k
  
7
Ralph Heid
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
Guard
   11 0 0 0 1 1 7/16 70k
(40+30)k
  
8
Bob Becker
Skeleton
5 3 3 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
+AG, Block
   11 3 1 0 1 2 18/31 100k
(40+60)k
  
9
William Theisz
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   12 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
10
Michael Josef Gusikov
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   11 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
11
Red Norvo
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   12 0 0 0 1 0 2/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
12
Evelyn Glennie
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
Block
   12 0 1 0 0 1 8/16 60k
(40+20)k
  
13
Dumisani Maraire
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   12 0 0 0 2 0 4/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
14
George Cary
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   12 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
15
Harry Breuer
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   0 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
16
Camille Saint-Saëns (le troisième)
Skeleton
5 3 2 7
Regeneration, Thick Skull
   0 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
16 players  
Coach: Eczemabeard Re-Rolls (140k): 5  
Race: Shambling Undead Fan Factor: 4  
Current Team Value: 1330k (±250) Assistant Coaches: 4  
Treasury: 40k Cheerleaders: 4  
Team Value: 1330k Apothecary: No  

Games Played:12 (1/0/11) |TD Diff:-30 (3 - 33) |Cas Diff:-28 (9/8/2 - 26/16/5)
Last Opponent: Jurassiques