Welcome to new and entertaining blog entry known as "Dear Timppis". Basically it's a questions and answers section where I will help people with the well known (and some less well known) inquiries and questions in the wonderful world of Blood Bowl. Without anymore of praise for Timppis and his amazing knowledge and witty (although sometimes a little too transparent in it's sarcasm) view of life and game, here's the first episode of "Dear Timppis"

Q: Help Timppis, my opponent is stalling and I don't know what to do?
"slowlearner"

A: Simple my dear friend. The usual answer would be something like this "Don't let it happen" or "Defend better" but I have a different approach. Instead of trying to stop your opponent from stalling, lay back, go to the refrigerator and pop yourself a soda. If they can stall in turns, you can do so in minutes. Afterall, four minutes for him to wait for you to do absolutely nothing to prevent his scoring frustrates even the toughest of players. Then if you really want to use this to your advantage, call it something like a "cunning plan" or "turtle defense". Easy, yet effective.

Q: Hey Timppis I have a question for you. My opponent has 15 dp's against my 14 (his troll has dp, mine doesn't). Should I hire Borak to even the odds?
"wannakill92"

A: This is actually a question that has been asked more and more recently. Of course even though having multiple dp's does make your team look like a bunch of neonazis on metamfetamin and surely brings both terror as well as respect from all the other players on gamefinder I'd still advice against Borak on this particular matter and instead go with wizard. Remember, 8 dp's clustered after a gangfoul is a great place for fireball.

Q: Hullo Mr.Timppis. I have a difficult one for you. How could I easily improve my CR now that I can no longer play with TR100 amazons and norse?
"tinythingy"

A: Ah, a classic question where you might find an answer like "CR doesn't matter " or "Try to learn to be a better player" However these are conventional and old perspectives that are a bit outdated. Instead I would recommend you the following pattern. You see it doesn't matter whether or not your team rating has gotten bigger. Just concede all of your four first games that don't count against your coach ranking. Then you have a team that is on the same line with rookieteams when it comes to TR, with the exception that YOU get the cr-boost from winning. And as an added bonus, your opponent might just look at your record and see 0/0/4 and think you are easy prey. This is fun and easy way to get that CR back up.

Q: Timppis, my opponent is giving me a complete asswhooping because the RNG is so broken. What do I do, it's not fun anymore!!!
"buttwhooped"

A: First of all, anyone who uses more than one exclamation mark should be shot on sight and fed to a troll for public safety. But if we leave out that horrible abomination of a grammar I can answer your question now. And don't think for a moment it's some lame answer like "Don't blame RNG" or "Do less risky moves". No, this is one hundred percent surefire way to help you. You see the RNG stalks and compares your stats and your opponents stats before the match and then selects which one of you will win, BUT, as in all computer programs it has a weak link. So next time you are in a situation like this take a deep breath, twist your neck few times, tell your opponent that he's going down so hard that it makes Deep Impact feel like a foreplay. Then at the start of your turn... do nothing... just click the end turn button. This reverses the luck and all those bad dice that were supposed to come to you are NOW IN YOUR OPPONENTS ROLLS! Then just enjoy as he rolls quad skulls with claw/rsc monster storm vermin and fails to pick up ball with bighand sure hands pro ag5 skaven thrower for three turns in a row. After the game, remember to gloat with your skill and tell your opponent what a whiny sore ass female dog they are for complaining about the dice. Also use a lot of "HAHAaa" and "YES!" and other similar comments during the game after you've reversed the luck. (Notice: This tactic can be countered with the same move by opponent, so beware of that subtle yet effective defense)

I hope you have enjoyed this, and I hope more will follow. Remember to enjoy, and praise or curse Nuffle depending on your results, mood and other things that might influence your attitude towards a fictional God of a fantasy football. (Don't hate me for this... seriously... please... Nuffle?)

Thank you and good night :)