2017-10-05 17:21:47
9 votes, rating 5.9
It was a dark and stormy night when the previous coach suddenly disappeared, leaving the Eagles without a coach for their last match of season 3. A very short hooded figure approached the team and promised them greatness and glory like they never saw before if they accepted him as head coach.
Dante Hightower, the team captain, was reluctant about him. He was seemingly too short to be an adult human, and smelled of cheese.
But, they had no other options. And so the last game of the season happened against the best defence in DLE, the Razorbacks. The eagles upset them, stopping their offense and winning the game 1-0. All was set for greatness for the Eagles in season 4. But then, seemingly out of nowhere, the coach started trading players and picks left and right to anyone and everyone.
On top of that, during the early games of season 4, many veterans lost their lives. The Pro Bowl Ogre, Dontarie Poe, died to a foul in the first game of season4. Losses continued to pile up, and the team was 0-0-3 after three games. But then, the Eagles got back to their former glory for one game, mauling the Thunderbolts in their fourth game. The season after that was disappointing, with the eagles going into mid-season at 2-2-5.
But the coach had some stinky plans in his mind, and after a flurry of trades acquired two world renowned players in the names of Moses Fairbanks JR, and the two times pro bowler Anders Hoffman. But the coach didnt stop there. He also bought up two amazing blitzers, one devastating killer and one extremely dexterous one. And then, one long time Wolfskins catcher joined in the form of Justin and a rushing thrower joined after the Los Cabos Marauders felt they didnt need him anymore.
The coach also grew several inches over the two seasons, and now looks like a proper adult*. He still smells of stinky cheese and devious plans, but at least he was willing to give us a long term plan for the Eagles and what he wants his ultimate team to look like.
''I want them to run f*cking fast, pomb their opponents and then run back. Swoop on them like a hawk!'' he said, quite convincingly I might add.
Rumors of the coach contacting multiple trade masters to help him cool down his trading have arisen recently, but hopefully they're all wrong. Since ..Trading fast and Playing fastâ„¢'' is the Eagles motto.