Tymless inspired me to post my current favorite joke (that doesn't entail an accent)

Guys go to a bar for a bachelor party and the best man pulls the groom to the bar.
"I wanted to bring you here because this bartender is amazing." the best man says.
"Order anything you want and just trust him."

The groom says to the bartender, "Could I get a Rum and Coke?"
The bartender says "Absolutely, here you go." Then hands him an apple.
"This is an apple", says the groom.
"Trust me" The bartender replies.
The groom takes a bite of the apple, "Interesting... this tastes like coke!"
Bartender says, "turn it around".
The man turns the apple around, takes another bite. "Whoa! it tastes like rum!"
"That's right" says the bartender.
"That's incredible!!... hey guys!" the groom calls his friends over.

One of his ushers comes over. "Order a mixed drink!" orders the groom.
The usher orders a Gin and Tonic.
Bartender says "Coming right up", and hands him an apple.
"What is this? some kind of joke? I said Gin and Tonic!"
The best man says, "Dude, trust me, take a bite out of the apple."
The usher takes a bite, "Wow!" he says, "It tastes just like gin!"
"Turn it around" says the groom.
The man turns it around, takes a bite and says, "Is that tonic? That's amazing!"
"I KNOW!" says the groom.

Russo stumbles over, already half in the bag and wanting to hit the gentlemen's club.
"What can I get you?" the bartender asks.
"Are we going to see the naked women yet?!" blurts Russo.
"We're still drinking, we'll go in a bit. This bartender is amazing!" says the groom.
"Order a drink." the best man says, "Check it out, there is an apple for anything you want."
Russo thinks for a moment... "Gimme one that tastes like pu$$y!!"
Bartender goes in the back... comes back with an apple. "Here you go", he says.
"YEaaaAH!" Russo says as he takes a bite... and spits it right out. "This tastes like sh1t!"
The Bartender smiles and says, "Turn it around".