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The Ethanol Cordials is a franchise whose illustrious history spans over four thousand years, two ages and two hundred incarnations. All aspects of the team follow strict codes of conduct created by four millennia of precedent. Everything from the pay scale of the managers to the cheers that the fans are allowed to chant has been documented, debated, and decided a thousand times over before the race of Man even came to the continent. In this, their 199th incarnation, the Cordials are the third oldest active team in FUMBBL (after Puupäät and the infamous Grotty Little Wankers). Kahlua, the last surviving original member of the team, has played in every game since January 3rd, 2003 - the 27th game since the re-opening of FUMBBL.They have achieved their most important mission thus far. They have played with courage, won with dignity, lost with grace, tried to make each play a work of art and suffered no fools lightly. A lot of brave souls have been lost along the way, but each one went to the twilight lands doing that which they loved best: playing to win for the sake of the game. Hailing from the Isle of Ethanolia, the team has traditional names for each position. When a player joins the Cordials, he leaves his old life, name, family, and even title behind. That elf is no more. He becomes something greater by far... a Cordial. Memorable alumni include: Porto - The second or third player purchased by the team, Porto was a terror on defense as he lept into the scrum on almost every important play. Cognac 2.0 - Cognac was Porto's replacement when he finally wore out. He did his job most admirably, considering the big shoes to fill. Bailey - Bailey was my favorite lineelf. He spent 53 games on the line staring down the scariest players in FUMBBL and lived to tell the tale... until he was knocked down next to the ballcarrier and killed on a (wisely done) strategic foul. Limone - Limone had the second longest career after Kahlua. While never a favored target on offense, he was a huge defensive asset. Grappa and Grappa 2.0 - Grappa was my favorite player on the team. 129 SPPs, 50-ish games and not a single permanent injury. He ultimately died on a random 1-die block from a rookie ghoul... raised as a zombie. Grappa 2.0 was an admirable replacement but he aged early and was never nearly as reliable. The Cordials have gone through two drastic reorganizations and are in the process of a third. WIth underdeveloped linemen and all the crucial players gone (except Kahlua), they need to rebuild. Can they pull it off? Only time will tell. As it is now, however, they are simply not representative of their inflated Rating. |
Player | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Inj | G | Cp | Td | It | Cs | Mvp | SPP | Cost | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1 |
Blitzer
|
7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block |
  | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 100k
(100+0)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
2 |
Blitzer
|
8 | 4 | 4 | 8 | Block +MA, +ST |
  | 8 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 29/31 | 180k
(100+80)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
3 |
Thrower
|
7 | 4 | 4 | 7 | Pass, Safe Throw Accurate, Dodge, Strong Arm, Safe Throw, Sure Hands, +ST, +MA |
-av, n | 70 | 165 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | Legend 188 |
280k
(90+190)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
4 |
Catcher
|
8 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Catch Block |
  | 6 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8/16 | 110k
(90+20)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
5 |
Thrower
|
6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Pass, Safe Throw Nerves Of Steel |
  | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14/16 | 110k
(90+20)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
6 |
Catcher
|
8 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Catch +AG, Leap, Block |
  | 11 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 34/51 | 170k
(90+80)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
9 |
Lineman
|
6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block, Dodge |
n | 40 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 22/31 | 110k
(70+40)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
10 |
Lineman
|
6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Kick |
  | 29 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15/16 | 90k
(70+20)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
11 |
Lineman
|
6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | m | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 70k
(0)k |
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
12 |
Lineman
|
6 | 4 | 4 | 8 | +ST, Block |
  | 40 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 27/31 | 140k
(70+70)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
13 |
Lineman
|
6 | 3 | 4 | 8 |   | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5/6 | 70k
(70+0)k |
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
15 |
Lineman
|
7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block, +MA |
  | 21 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 18/31 | 120k
(70+50)k |
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||
11 players (+1 player missing next game) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Games Played: | 70 (31/12/27) | | | TD Diff: | 22 (176 - 154) | | | Cas Diff: | -108 (30/14/10 - 90/55/17) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Last Opponent: Painful Power Painters |
For | Against | ||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Opponent | Race | TV | SPP | Cas | Gold | Score | TV | SPP | Cas | Gold | Gate |
Men In Tights | Wood Elf | 1000k | 9 | 1/0/0 | 50k | 0 - 3 | 930k | 19 | 2/0/0 | 70k | 51k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 1070k | 10 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 4 - 1 | 1050k | 14 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 34k |
Ministry of Pain | Chaos | 1170k | 16 | 0/0/1 | 100k | 3 - 2 | 1050k | 16 | 2/1/0 | 80k | 66k |
RedHammer's Clan | Dwarf | 1310k | 9 | 0/0/0 | 30k | 2 - 2 | 1390k | 12 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 57k |
Gold Diggers | Dwarf | 1370k | 17 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 3 - 0 | 1150k | 6 | 0/0/0 | 30k | 44k |
Scales of Justice | Lizardmen | 1410k | 20 | 0/2/0 | 70k | 3 - 1 | 1410k | 14 | 1/1/1 | 60k | 61k |
Never Play With Green Team-mates. | Orc | 1540k | 25 | 1/0/0 | 40k | 4 - 1 | 1660k | 13 | 2/0/0 | 20k | 78k |
Swift Bezerkerz | Norse | 1630k | 7 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 2 - 3 | 1770k | 20 | 0/0/1 | 50k | 64k |
Whimps | Skaven | 1670k | 15 | 1/0/1 | 40k | 4 - 2 | 1700k | 15 | 0/2/0 | 30k | 70k |
Pure Green | Orc | 1720k | 15 | 0/0/0 | 100k | 1 - 0 | 1700k | 4 | 2/1/0 | 0k | 55k |
Norse Wind | Norse | 1860k | 16 | 3/1/0 | 50k | 2 - 3 | 1790k | 23 | 1/1/1 | 80k | 84k |
Terrifying Anarchists of Naggaroth | Dark Elf | 1960k | 20 | 2/0/0 | 80k | 2 - 5 | 2890k | 31 | 1/1/0 | 40k | 115k |
Khaduum cows | Chaos Dwarf | 1970k | 12 | 1/1/1 | 40k | 2 - 4 | 1970k | 27 | 1/4/0 | 50k | 73k |
KKZ, the old TOP Khaos | Chaos | 2000k | 13 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 1 - 3 | 1850k | 17 | 1/0/0 | 80k | 84k |
Khorne Utd | Chaos | 2070k | 13 | 1/1/0 | 20k | 1 - 1 | 1640k | 10 | 0/0/1 | 20k | 66k |
Doriath Silver Helms | High Elf | 2030k | 17 | 0/0/0 | 10k | 2 - 3 | 2140k | 23 | 2/0/0 | 70k | 95k |
Extreme Foerenders | Chaos | 2090k | 14 | 0/1/0 | 10k | 2 - 1 | 1930k | 10 | 1/0/0 | 40k | 61k |
Whispers in the Night | Undead | 2130k | 17 | 0/0/1 | 50k | 2 - 3 | 2640k | 23 | 2/1/1 | 40k | 101k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 2100k | 14 | 1/0/0 | 40k | 2 - 4 | 2180k | 24 | 1/1/0 | 10k | 65k |
Terrifying Anarchists of Naggaroth | Dark Elf | 2100k | 10 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 1 - 3 | 3370k | 23 | 1/0/0 | 10k | 114k |
KKZ, the old TOP Khaos | Chaos | 2180k | 15 | 1/0/0 | 20k | 2 - 4 | 2240k | 22 | 2/0/0 | 70k | 102k |
Bovine Pandemic | Chaos Dwarf | 2230k | 9 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 1 - 2 | 2220k | 19 | 2/2/0 | 40k | 102k |
RedHammer's Clan | Dwarf | 2300k | 15 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 2 - 2 | 2170k | 20 | 2/1/0 | 50k | 103k |
East Side Anarchs Union | Amazon | 2270k | 15 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 3 - 2 | 2170k | 14 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 92k |
Interesting Times | Norse | 2340k | 22 | 3/0/0 | 50k | 4 - 3 | 3330k | 27 | 1/2/1 | 30k | 138k |
Moody Cows | Chaos Dwarf | 2360k | 12 | 1/0/0 | 40k | 1 - 2 | 2080k | 13 | 0/0/0 | 80k | 122k |
Castrop-Rauxel-Cannibals | Undead | 2440k | 21 | 1/0/0 | 40k | 5 - 0 | 2450k | 21 | 5/2/0 | 40k | 94k |
Daggerdale Scions | Wood Elf | 2480k | 20 | 1/0/0 | 60k | 5 - 3 | 2410k | 20 | 0/1/0 | 50k | 119k |
Trogs Terrors | Orc | 2600k | 20 | 1/0/0 | 30k | 3 - 2 | 2250k | 12 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 85k |
Castrop-Rauxel-Cannibals | Undead | 2680k | 13 | 0/0/0 | 0k | 3 - 3 | 2700k | 26 | 1/2/1 | 30k | 113k |
Moria Masticators | Orc | 2500k | 17 | 0/0/0 | 30k | 3 - 0 | 2320k | 12 | 2/1/0 | 30k | 120k |
Trogs Terrors | Orc | 2570k | 11 | 0/1/0 | 50k | 1 - 2 | 2400k | 17 | 3/0/0 | 20k | 101k |
Da Lazy Boyz | Orc | 2360k | 22 | 0/0/0 | 0k | 4 - 2 | 2110k | 23 | 4/1/0 | 0k | 79k |
Rage against the Machine | Dwarf | 2410k | 11 | 0/1/0 | 60k | 1 - 3 | 1960k | 19 | 1/2/0 | 50k | 111k |
Teenage Mutant Ninja Ratz | Skaven | 2480k | 22 | 0/0/0 | 60k | 4 - 3 | 2020k | 18 | 2/0/0 | 40k | 91k |
We Bring Great Evil | Dark Elf | 2480k | 17 | 0/1/0 | 20k | 3 - 2 | 2600k | 25 | 2/2/0 | 40k | 88k |
Whispering Nighthunters | Dark Elf | 2550k | 14 | 0/0/1 | 80k | 1 - 0 | 2600k | 0 | 0/0/0 | 0k | 104k |
Metal Heads | Undead | 2490k | 12 | 1/0/0 | 50k | 1 - 2 | 2000k | 18 | 0/0/2 | 40k | 102k |
Saldana's Skavens | Skaven | 2210k | 16 | 1/0/0 | 50k | 2 - 2 | 2240k | 17 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 69k |
SourSea Stranglers | Undead | 2290k | 22 | 0/0/1 | 70k | 4 - 1 | 2080k | 16 | 2/0/1 | 20k | 106k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 2250k | 22 | 0/0/0 | 70k | 3 - 3 | 2010k | 29 | 2/3/0 | 30k | 124k |
Dark Souls | Chaos | 2300k | 10 | 0/0/0 | 0k | 1 - 2 | 1880k | 15 | 1/2/0 | 80k | 82k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 2310k | 13 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 2 - 3 | 2400k | 18 | 0/1/0 | 80k | 122k |
Tornskull Clan | Orc | 2350k | 25 | 1/0/0 | 70k | 4 - 1 | 2100k | 14 | 1/0/0 | 50k | 112k |
Dark Souls | Chaos | 2470k | 16 | 0/0/0 | 10k | 2 - 2 | 2500k | 24 | 5/0/0 | 0k | 95k |
Annuliis Defenders | High Elf | 2520k | 25 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 4 - 3 | 1860k | 24 | 1/0/0 | 80k | 107k |
Dark Souls | Chaos | 2600k | 19 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 3 - 0 | 2640k | 5 | 0/0/0 | 30k | 111k |
Unlucky Stars | Wood Elf | 2650k | 29 | 0/1/0 | 50k | 5 - 2 | 2480k | 20 | 1/0/0 | 50k | 90k |
Dark Souls | Chaos | 2770k | 19 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 3 - 1 | 2910k | 17 | 2/0/1 | 40k | 105k |
Annuliis Defenders | High Elf | 2820k | 21 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 4 - 0 | 2310k | 8 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 102k |
Red Menace | Skaven | 2880k | 14 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 1 - 4 | 2820k | 29 | 3/1/0 | 10k | 112k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 2920k | 16 | 0/0/1 | 20k | 2 - 2 | 3580k | 23 | 0/0/2 | 20k | 127k |
Alternative Living | Wood Elf | 2890k | 18 | 1/0/0 | 10k | 2 - 4 | 2910k | 27 | 0/1/0 | 40k | 106k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 2930k | 21 | 0/0/0 | 30k | 3 - 2 | 3840k | 18 | 1/1/0 | 50k | 148k |
Re-Run | Wood Elf | 2990k | 23 | 0/1/0 | 40k | 3 - 4 | 3160k | 24 | 0/0/2 | 10k | 126k |
Tornskull Clan | Orc | 2790k | 18 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 3 - 1 | 2500k | 14 | 1/1/0 | 30k | 110k |
Los Carniceros | Orc | 2870k | 28 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 5 - 0 | 2600k | 16 | 2/2/0 | 0k | 86k |
Back To Dreadwood | Wood Elf | 2940k | 21 | 0/0/0 | 0k | 3 - 6 | 2480k | 35 | 1/2/0 | 50k | 105k |
Farwood Fire | Wood Elf | 2980k | 24 | 0/0/1 | 20k | 3 - 4 | 2530k | 17 | 0/1/0 | 40k | 141k |
Rats maze | Skaven | 2470k | 12 | 1/0/0 | 10k | 1 - 2 | 2290k | 16 | 0/1/0 | 30k | 95k |
Kneebreakers | Dwarf | 2380k | 15 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 2 - 0 | 2170k | 13 | 2/1/0 | 20k | 75k |
Wily Women | Amazon | 1930k | 21 | 0/1/1 | 60k | 3 - 3 | 1820k | 17 | 1/0/0 | 80k | 80k |
Lethal Injection | Necromantic | 1990k | 21 | 1/1/0 | 70k | 2 - 2 | 2140k | 19 | 0/2/0 | 30k | 94k |
Screaming_Eagles | Wood Elf | 2100k | 20 | 0/0/0 | 50k | 3 - 4 | 1760k | 23 | 1/0/0 | 60k | 79k |
Da Mope Tribe Lawn Mowas | Orc | 2180k | 20 | 0/0/1 | 40k | 3 - 1 | 2030k | 17 | 2/0/1 | 20k | 87k |
Dark Souls | Chaos | 2250k | 18 | 1/1/0 | 40k | 3 - 1 | 3030k | 23 | 5/2/0 | 0k | 110k |
Blackrock Clan | Orc | 2340k | 19 | 1/0/0 | 20k | 3 - 3 | 2750k | 19 | 1/0/1 | 0k | 92k |
Farwood's Revenge | Wood Elf | 2400k | 14 | 0/0/0 | 20k | 2 - 4 | 2250k | 23 | 3/0/0 | 60k | 93k |
Charbroiled Chefs | Halfling | 1930k | 22 | 3/0/0 | 90k | 2 - 2 | 2110k | 25 | 5/4/0 | 50k | 127k |
Painful Power Painters | Orc | 2060k | 6 | 0/0/0 | 40k | 0 - 3 | 1910k | 17 | 0/1/0 | 70k | 85k |