SO many were so helpful with advice for the RL UKTCIV I went to as my first ever RL Toruney I felt I owed anyone that cared a report. Here it is.

I went off to meet someone i'd chatted to on the internet, they had seemed really nice and told me I'd have a great time.
It turned out to be a 40year old white guy. He took me to a town called York and said we'd be playing together and he'd let me play with his bits if i didn't want to play with my own.....in the UK Team Championship for Blood Bowl. Then we arrived and I am staying in Room 101, in a convent. The lady told us where our rooms were, and where the chapel was. At this stage i thought 'when i meet him downstairs, if it's him and three other guys in long white robes.......... i could be in trouble here.

But, reassuringly, we went to the pub and i met the people i was expecting to run into, geggster, purplegoo, kfoged all smiley and cool, others too numerous to mention, very few Fumbblers. We hooked up with Endzone and said hello, chatted and beered. Not too late, but not to early, we went to bed. Separately. There was a lock. Malmir joined in the morning and was a really nice guy, all three are both exactly what you'd expect and yet utterly different too. You can see the mind and competitiveness online, but not the gentle accents, smiles and flushes that makes for real human communication. All 4 of us sometimes get viewed as Boss Level Bad Guys, and actually we're only human after all, don't put your blame on me. (such a tune) Was nice to have the support and friendship of like minded fools. I'm the odd one out, the rest all being the same age and married at the same time. In general though if you drew a Venn Diagram for attendees at the event and had circles for 'Beard' 'Middle Aged' 'Overweight' and 'Balding' there were very few outside it, and I'm include all Team Fanstastic.

I was coaching Dwarves, PeteW took Undead, Malmir suffered Dark Elf and Endzone bent the laws of time and MA with Wood Cheats.

We began against a 'cyanide team', turned out my oppo was a 20 tourney vet that plays Rl weekly and had Undead, Malmirs was the no.2 rated DE coach in the country. For me 4 pushes needing a pow on blockless ghoul cost me a guard blitzer surfed and he broke up my offence, I was holding him second half and it was 60% draw when he got team orders that he had to win, rolled a great dice turn with 5 3+ dodges and 4 GFI with only 1 reroll cover. I still got pressure to the ball but 2 more dodges and a one die for push and he ran it in. I had 2 turns and was 3+2+2+ away from the equaliser but it came up a 3. so 0/0/1. Endzone went down to a one turner but PeteW and Malmir brought home wins and we took a team draw.

We drew 'Ze Germans' in a private room, our disappointment was only exceeded by theirs I think. I played Candlejack's Undead. He is a huge hairy pile of german loveliness. But everything clicked for everyone and we came away with 3 wins and a draw. i got my first RL TD (I DID stand and roar, I didn't shirtcopter. It was cold and I am fat). CandleJack was to be the only fumbbl coach i faced. I got a RL TT BB win, all the rest is gravy.

With our team record now at 1/1/0 and after a strong win we headed up toward the top tables and were never to face a weak set of opponents. Third game was vs the Geordies, one of the key contender teams. PeteW was rolling like it was Sunday and won, Malmir was diced. I took on a very strong coach with (at least at one time) a very high national standing and swept him before me in a total dicing. he was lovely about it but also had a very red face and neck. Endzone's opponent was trying to game him, bringing up chess clocks early and being very exact about the timing rules and implications. Endzone stepped up and took a great draw from a tight game, mastering his time perfectly.

Team is 2/1/0, I end day one at 2/0/1.

Team Fantastic had a very nice dinner and a few drinks, set the world to rights a bit and went to bed. It's all a lot more tiring than I'd expected. Good night out though. Odd to be able to discuss the thing I do so much with people, when I rarely talk about it in real life. We did discuss a few other things. I think.

Sunday: We drew some Scottish peoples coaching as the human league. Tied with Ze Germans as the nicest people we faced. We had some nice match ups on paper, I faced Norse first. Took 2 out early and then only 2 stuns all game, T8 first half the Yeti kills a dorf, same turn one of second half. I pull myself back into the drive but he pulls a decent dice turn and gets the 1-1, probably about right given cas dice. PeteW goes down fighting, Endzone triumphs and Malmir is again lucked and draws. Team Draw. Trophy chance gone. PeteW pretends really hard not to mind, and does so quite well.

Second game. Norwegians and I get norse again. had him pinned on sideline in all sorts of trouble, he rolled 4+4+ to get out after 3 prior dodges and a one die frenzy for -2 die, and then finally failed the 3+. With the ball on the ground I needed a push or pow on 8 dice, all skulls or skull pows. Every damn one.

I then needed to rescue it with a simple Runner dodge, failed the 3+ to dodge runner out and fetch ball with range to get safe afterwards, and he scored. The kick goes to backfield and I cant run it in in 2 turns. I dominated second half and first, but a draw. Team does better though and we come away with 3 wins. I'm grumpy. AV7 just isn't breaking.

We face a french team last and i decimate some woodies on armour rolls. After 9 of 11 go down on a Pitch Invasion I build a proper mega bunker and he gets no where near me. Second half he’s down to 7 and Tree (rooted) I take the Last Dancer down ball goes to ground and my runner cant get to it, it’s in 3 of my Tacklezones but they one die someone onto it, nice bounce for them, pick up in 2 tz's after dodging 4 times at 3+ (never failed a dodge all game until turn 16, and i had him marked up all over because I was always numbers ahead) and i had 3 turns to score v 6 elves and a tree with 11, 2 runners and 2 blitzers and 2 rerolls, he rolls riot and it adds on so I only have 2 and he dodges and walls it up. 1-1. I'm blue balls after 3 draws. The Team was finally beaten, by me not securing that win, went down 2/1/1 to the French, with only Endzone rampant.


so 2/3/1 personally for the event, but I feel 2 of the draws were never going to be losses and had really good shots to be wins, and the loss was a 45/45 draw/loss, with a shot at the win if he went for the win and blew it. The 2 wins were solid and a one draw always looked that way. and I'll take that. I come away unembarrassed, and feel/hope I let no one down. It could have been better but it wasn't.

Malmir went 2/2/2 with some horrible dice and one turning on him.
Endzone went 3/0/0 day 2 to finish 4/1/1
PeteW went for 3/0/0 day 1 to 4/0/2


Team Fantastic was 3/2/1 and finished 8th of 40, only beaten by the french who were incredible coaches, even if one was rather rude. the winners had 44 points and we had 38.
We played teams that finished 4, 6, 7, 14 and 21 out of 40 (close approximation of what PeteW told me and not actual facts)
so no idiots sadly, all 6 games were properly coached and no one I faced did anything I thought they shouldn’t and almost always what I would have done.
i finshed 48 of 160
i think Endzone was about 10th and Pete maybe top 20 (again, lies based on vague memory)
Would I do another? sure, if it fit my life.
having a team really helped and meant i felt less of a idiot as everyone there seemed to be Tourney veterans.

There were some idiots, but we didn’t get them game one and then when we decimated 'Ze Germans' in game 2 were always on the top few tables playing proper opposition. One of the top teams there drew a team playing 4 stunty rosters first round. I don't know if it was random or seeded, i suspect random, but that seemed a very friendly way in for them.

But for my first 6 games in RL, which is bewildering and far more intense than I'd imagined, everyone was mostly very nice, but people do try a few Mind games and really really want to win. I come away feeling no one is about to pop into fumbbl and say either 'PurpleChest was there and is an arse' or 'PC can't cut it in RL' and i think 2/3/1 will do me (as a starting point). I really wanted at the very least a win, and to come away even or better felt like it wasn't totally unreasonable a stretch goal, and I did. So, that'll do.

I'd do it again, especially as part of a team, but there are huge 'barriers to entry'. I had a little look beforehand and any painted team is going to set you back £100, or easily double if you want them to look oK, and then you have a choice of one race to play. Add travel, accommodation and a few bits and bobs and boards and its a serious chunk of cash. Of course I pay £1000 a year for a season ticket, so perspective there is also a good thing. I might be looking at the local Nerd Barn (Barnet GW) for a local, cheap, child labour style Mini painter and you never know. He/She best have a lot of Purple paint.