Mayemi Nereid-fins Open Bonehead Season 3 with 1-1 Tie vs. Four Farthings

The Mayemi Nereid-fins kicked off Bonehead League Season 3 with a 1-1 draw vs. the Four Farthings. The Four Farthings old world alliance squad got their TD from lineman Theoden King, dominating Mayemi on the ground with 39 yards rushing over just 18 yards for the Nereid-fins. Mayemi got the equalizer in the second half from catcher Falyn Woodyl and held Four Farthings scoreless in the half, despite managing only 10 successfully blocks for the game vs. Four Farthings’ 25.


Theoden King runs around Mayemi blitzer Jalyn Killyps to get the edge along the northern sideline for the opening score

“We definitely need to find a way to be more physical out there,” said Mayem Coach Mickon McDenial after the match. “It’s tough with elves though. These fellas seem to be more interested in running away from contact. And that treeman threw them off a bit. It’s sacrilegious for them to hit a tree.”

The Nereid-fins strategy of dodging away from any and all blocks nearly paid off in the first half, as their withdrawn defense came within inches from holding the Old World Alliance team out of the end zone. After Bard scooped up the opening kick-off, the Four Farthings quickly assembled a cage of blockers for their thrower and slowly made their way up field. Fangorn and human blitzer Aragorn son of Arathorn did their best to clear a path, blitzing Mayemi’s elves one by one. But each time, the Nereid-fin players merely picked themselves up off the ground, dusted off their Cathay silk uniforms, and reassembled into an impenetrable column defense.

“Sometimes the best defense is a matter of just getting in the way,” explained Mayemi captain blitzer Rahor Mossheart. “When the forces of chaos tried invade the elven kingdoms in the first age, for instance, they say it wasn’t the elves’ warcraft that stopped them but rather the dead bodies. The orcs and goblin hordes killed so many of our ancestors, they couldn’t get past all the corpses.”

In the closing seconds Mayemi had columned off the entire end-zone except for a small path along the northern sideline. Unable to break through, Bard handed the ball to Theoden, who scampered around the edge and sprinted across the goal line to put the Four Farthings up 1-0 just before the halftime whistle.

“That one’s on me,” said Coach McDenial. “I just didn’t think Theoden was fast enough. Last I saw him, he was old and withered and could barely move. Always had this creepy guy whispering in his ear. I don’t know what happened. Must be taking some new kind of multi-vitamin.”

Mayemi quickly evened the score in the second half after a touchback gave speedy catcher Odyl Bekym the ball near midfield. Streaking up the southern sideline, Beckym was deep in Four Farthings territory before troll slayer Dain Ironfoot got a hold of him. Just before the dwarf could take him down, however, Beckym handed the ball to Woodyl, who crossed the goal line untouched to tie the game at 1-1.


Woodyl scores to tie the game early in the second half.

After a pack of Four Farthings halfling fans who called themselves “The Sheriffs” stormed the field on the ensuing kickoff and knocked three Mayemi players to the pitch with legs of roast mutton, the Nereid-find were forced to get more aggressive with their defense in the second half. Mossheart challenged the Four Farthings blockers and pinned Bard in near the southern sideline, opening an opportunity for line-elf Aryn Brewyr to get a shot at the ball carrier.

As Bard attempted to stiff-arm Brewyr, the elf wrestled the thrower to the ground, knocking the ball loose, and giving the Nereid-fins a chance to steal the game. The ball bounced precariously near the southern sideline, landing momentarily in Woodyl’s hands, before Ironfoot sent the catcher to the pitch with a vicious blitzing right cross.

Line-elf Paderyk Pyl was able to scoop the ball off the ground and hand it too Mossheart, who looked up field to see Kadyr Kohoo deep in Four Farthings territory. After Brewyr wrestled Theoden to the ground along the sidelines, the only thing standing in Mossheart’s way was the old king’s prone body. However, as Mossheart attempted to leap over Theoden’s body and get up field to make the pass to Kohoo for the winning TD, he tripped Theoden, fell to the ground, and lost the ball.

“I guess that whole thing about bodies getting in the way can work both ways,” said Mossheart on the failed attempt.


Mossheart trips over Theoden’s prone body and loses the ball, derailing Mayemi’s last-second scoring threat

The Four Farthings then had their own chance for a last-second game-winning score. However, as Bard attempted to pitch the ball forward to a wide-open Eowyn Eomund's Daughter, the catcher inexplicably dropped the pass, and the final whistle sounded, ending the game in a 1-1 tie.

“Eowyn had been giving that Aragorn guy these longing looks all game, and he was standing a few yards behind her at the end there,” said McDenial on the blown play that gave his team the tie. “So, luckily for us, she was a bit distracted on that last play.”