Nereid-fins Top Bloodletters 3-1 in High-Flying Duel of Throwers

The Mayemi Nereid-fins took advantage of a few uncharacteristic vampire miscues to earn a 3-1 victory over the Nessheim Bloodletters and remain undefeated in the Bonehead League Season 3. In a pass-heavy game that featured a combines 7 completions, the Nereid-fins were led once again by their catchers, with two touchdowns from Odyl Bekym and one from Falyn Woodyl. The Bloodletters earned their lone TD from vampire runner Hellana Loungewere and completed four passes on the day, while two second-half incompletions from vampire thrower Tarquin Lawnsledger cost them the game.


Skylar Thornson outduels two vampire throwers in his debut, allowing fans to momentarily overlook that Danyla Marynthrow had 0 completions in the game

“That’s the thing with vampires,” said Mayemi Coach Mickon McDenial after the game. “They throw really well early, but later after they’ve nibbled on a bunch of their thralls throughout the game, not so much. It’s all that blood on their hands, I guess. Makes the ball slippery.”

The Bloodletters got on the board first with an early first-half TD on a drive that highlighted the terrifying skills vampires bring to the pitch. Despite losing the ball after Mayemi blitzer Jaylyn Killyps took Loungewere to the ground with a flying roundhouse kick to the fangs along the northern sideline, the Bloodletters used a series of hypnotic gazes to regain the ball and carve a bloody path toward the endzone in mere seconds.

“I tried not to look in their eyes, but those runners …” said Mayemi captain Rahor Mossheart. “Well, they wear some rather low-cut uniforms, and corsets, and … um, let’s just say their eyes aren’t the only things that can hypnotize you.”


Loungewear celebrates her TD in the end zone, as the still dazed Nereid-fins look on

The Bloodletters hypnotic skills clearly had the Nereid-fins spooked on their ensuing drive, as a key mistake seemed to be motivated mostly by fear. After breaking into the clear deep in Nessheim territory, Woodyl, looking back over his shoulder, and terrified at the prospect of being caught from behind, tried to leg it out for some extra yardage. Instead, he tripped over his own feet, lost the ball in the Bloodletters endzone, and left the field with a torn ACL. (Fortunately, the Mayemi apothecary was able to patch up the injury with some cat gut, a rusty knife, and a prayer to the elven healing gods.)

“It’s not really the whole undead lords of evil thing that scares you,” said Woodyl on being intimidated into the miscue. “It’s the speed and the skill … and OK, it is a little unnerving when you see them dig into one of their teammate’s jugulars and send a fountain of blood spurting across the pitch.”

Down 1-0 in the second half, Mayemi struck quick to tie the game on a stretch play that covered the entire field. Backed up against his own goal line, new thrower Skylar Thornson hit Woodyl with a pass at midfield. As Woodyl sprinted toward the endzone and the Bloodletters closed in, he handed the ball to Beckym, who found paydirt, completing the “hook and ladder” before Nessheim could close in.

The Bloodletters tried to mount a quick scoring drive of their own after receiving the ensuing kick-off. However, Lawnsledger’s attempted pass up field slipped off the side of his bloody hand and bounced into the open field deep in Bloodletter territory. Thornson rushed forward to scoop up the ball, wiped some of the blood off it, and then quickly tossed it to Beckym, who returned the favor to Woodyl, handing him the ball in the endzone, so his fellow catcher could give Mayemi the 2-1 lead.


Lawnsledger fumbles the pass as his embarrassed thralls look on. “Honestly, after seeing that, I’m kind of ashamed I let that guy feed on me,” said one thrall who asked not to be named. “I mean my doctor, Count Von Feedsalot, tells me that these bloodlettings are crucial for good health, but I think from now on, I just might stick to leeches. Wait a minute. Count Von Feedsalot ... ? Oh no. Do you think maybe this whole bloodletting-gets-rid-of-toxins thing is just a scam to keep these Nessheim lords well fed?"

Nessheim’s next possession went exactly the same way, as Lawnsledger once again sent the ball to the pitch on an errant pass. This time, it landed right at the feet of Beckym, who quickly scooped it up and ran untouched across the goal line to give Mayemi the insurance TD, sealing the victory 3-1.

“I’d prefer to get a TD by making a dazzling catch that might be immortalized in the magecast replays,” said Beckym of the touchdown. “But if the other team is going to just drop the ball at my feet, hey, I’ll take it.”

At 3-2-0, Mayemi seems to have solidified its playoff positioning heading into the final stretch of the regular season. Currently, they are sitting in second or first place in the Warpstone division pending the outcome of the match-up between the Stratford Ratbags and Four Farthings. But the Nereid-fins know they will need to continue to play at a high level to avoid a late season collapse.